Page 89 of Light Up My Life

My eyes stung. “He’s more than that.”

She squeezed my hand. “I know. But who wants to go to that bougie party with all those insufferable rich people who only care about their own portfolios and wouldn’t know Christmas magic if it slapped them in the face anyway?”

I let out a watery laugh.

“You still planning on talking to your parents after Christmas? Telling them about Ryan?”

“Marcus thinks I should wait a couple weeks. Make sure this is going to last before I spring something this big on them.”

“And what do you think?”

“I don’t know anymore. I want to tell them. But for now, I need to tell Ryan that I’m not going to the ball.”

“How are you going to do that?” she asked.

“In person, I hope.”

Because Ryan and I didn’t hang out at school, I didn’t know where he hung out at school. I checked all the places I’d seen him—in the hall, at his locker, outside chem lab, near the front office—but he wasn’t there. And after school, his car wasn’t in his driveway. Was I going to have to just text him?

That afternoon, I was standing on my porch looking at Ryan’s house as the sun was heading down. But instead of Ryan’s car pulling up, like I was hoping, Will’s little sedan pulling his hot cocoa trailer rattled onto the street and stopped in front of Mr. Lenny’s house like it did every night. It reminded me of what Marcus had accused me of the other day—flirting with Will. Had I? If I had, it wasn’t on purpose. I had no feelings whatsoever for him, despite how much my family wished I did. Despite how much easier my life would be if I did.

I gave one last look toward Ryan’s empty driveway before launching myself forward.

“Hey,” Will said when I reached him. He was at the front of the trailer, cranking down the jack. “You look like you’re on a mission.”

“Do I?”

“Or maybe you just want a hot chocolate really badly.”

I laughed. “No. I wanted to—sorry.”

“Sorry?”

“Have I been flirting with you?”

“What?” He straightened up, the jack now in place, stabilizing the front of the trailer. He didn’t make me repeat the question, though. It seemed to finally hit him. “Oh, no. I’ve been flirting with you. And unfortunately for me, it has not been returned. I think I finally got the hint.” He nodded toward Ryan’s house.

My eyes widened. He had somehow put two and two together?

“At the movie the other night,” Will added.

Oh! He’d seen us in the back, talking. I thought he hadn’t. “Right. Well, um … my moms don’t really know. They don’t get along with his family.”

“Yeah, Harris said something about not talking to them.”

“Yes.”

“Sorry.”

“Because this is your fault somehow?”

“It felt like the right thing to say,” he said.

“Thanks,” I said.

The lights and music clicked on at Ryan’s house. I hadn’t noticed that the sun had finally disappeared, the sky still a light gray but heading toward black. A couple breaths later, my house’s lights clicked on, the snow in my snow globe swirling to life. I was so happy I’d finally figured out how to make it work. It looked so good.

Will reached through the window of his trailer and pulled out two blocks of wood. He positioned them behind his back tires.