Page 98 of All Yours

‘I dropped you?’

‘You just stopped texting, out of the blue, like we weren’t even anything, not even friends . . .’

‘But when Finn was there . . .’ he said, wanting to explain, feeling the stab of guilt in his gut. He had cut her dead every day afterwards with his text response.

‘Exactly, it was like Finn turned up and you used it as an excuse to move on,’ she said, and now she sounded angry.

‘No, wait,’ he said, not wanting her to think that anything about their situation was just a bit of fun. ‘I thought you said . . .’ he began again, wondering how to tell her that he’d overheard her conversation, and that he’d been shattered. That he’d acted out of self-preservation, but she wasn’t listening anyway.

‘And now you’re with Erin,’ she said, and this time she sounded furious. ‘Who’s absolutely perfect for you, by the way.’

‘I wouldn’t exactly say—’ Fox broke in to defend himself now but she was on a roll.

‘Quickest replacement ever! Look, I get it. You’ve got commitment issues, just like every other man in my life.’ She squared her shoulders and bit her lip hard, in an effort to control her emotion. ‘But you should sort yourself out first before you mess any other girls around. Erin doesn’t deserve that! It’s obvious that you can’t move on. Not when you’re still in love with Meg.’

Fox’s mouth dropped open.

‘Which I can totally understand. She died so suddenly, it’s something that will be with you for ever.’

Robyn couldn’t be more wrong, about all of it. Since that day at Meg’s grave, when he admitted his feelings for Robyn to himself, he’d been plagued by a recurring dream. Every night, he dreamed of Meg and she was smiling and happy, but telling him that it was time. That he should move on. That she was okay. Every time he woke, he was calling out Meg’s name in farewell. It felt big, it felt significant – like a shift in his universe.

He would always love Meg, and he would always honour her memory, and she would always be the mother of his boys, his most precious people. But he was in love with Robyn. Totally and completely. Even if she didn’t love him back, and she obviously didn’t. The words ringing in his ears were ‘friends’ and ‘fun and games’. Still, he hated to see her hurt.

They’d stopped dancing, and were standing frozen, facing each other on the crowded dance floor. The air between them crackled with tension.

‘You’ve got it wrong,’ Fox said, pulling her closer and lifting her chin with his thumb and forefinger. ‘So wrong, Red.’

The charge was suddenly electric. He had to tell her how he felt. It didn’t matter that she didn’t feel the same. He just wanted her to know that he loved her.

‘Let me explain—’ he started.

‘Gosh, sorry, am I interrupting?’ Erin stammered, appearing beside them, looking from one to the other. Guilt flooded Fox when he saw the embarrassed flush on her face, the uncertainty in the way she bit her lip. God, he was letting everyone down. Robyn paused for a split second, then he saw her gather herself and square her shoulders before stepping back. The gap between them had never felt so big.

‘Not at all,’ Robyn said to Erin, her face blank and expressionless, her chin high. ‘He’s all yours.’

Despite her bravado, the last thing he saw was a tear spill from under Robyn’s mask and run down her cheek before she turned and disappeared into the crowd. Fuck. He hadn’t had a chance to explain that he never meant to mess her around. Though maybe she was messing him about too – how could she care so much about him if he meant nothing at all? Either way, it looked like it was now too late to do anything about it.

Chapter Fifty-Five

Robyn

Robyn pushed blindly through the crowd, finding her way to the exit and breaking free into the hall. Ignoring the ladies’ bathroom, where there would be too many prying eyes, she turned instead onto the grand central staircase and ran up to the landing, where it was shadowy and quiet. Throwing herself onto the plushy sofa in the corner, she rested her head in her hands and sobbed her heart out, angry and hurt and lonely as hell.

Seeing Fox again had been too much. She hadn’t realised quite how much she missed him, or how strongly she felt for him, until she’d spotted him, devastatingly handsome in a tux. That realisation was made all the harder seeing Erin draped over him, hearing them talk about their joint Christmas Day. That’s obviously how Fox operated: he’d meet someone new, have fun with them for a while, and then move on, all the while staying stuck in the past. If only he could see there was space in his heart for more than one love.

Tears dripped off her chin and her chest heaved with a storm of emotion, and the feeling that she was back out on her own again. Just her and Willow. Suddenly that felt harder to take than ever before.

The gentle hand on her back made her jump and she looked up to see Wren’s worried face. Somehow, she wasn’t surprised to see her.

‘What is it, Robs? What’s wrong?’ Wren lowered herself to the sofa beside her. She circled her hand on Robyn’s back soothingly, but it only made Robyn cry harder.

Finally, she wiped her face and sniffed and Wren handed her a packet of tissues from her evening bag.

‘You’ve come prepared . . .’ Robyn said, blowing her nose noisily.

‘Robs, you’d never guess half the things I have in this bag. I’m thirty-six weeks pregnant with twins, I’ve got to be prepared for everything.’

Robyn gave a half-hearted chuckle at that, sinking back against the sofa, exhausted emotionally.