Page 79 of Cousin Conundrum

“If she is not angry with Cat, then she did not truly care for Mr. Bingley,” Miss Edith said flatly.

Mrs. Archer issued a fruity chuckle. “Some women do not house deep or true emotions. They are the fortunate ones, for their hearts cannot be broken.”

Kitty dug her nails into her palm, then caught Cat looking and eased her hand back open. “Jane is caring for Elizabeth.”

“Is your sister still so unwell?” Miss Archer sat forward eagerly.

Did she want Elizabeth to be unwell? Kitty looked about at the four, uncertain who she detested the most. She truly hoped they were criminals and that Mr. Fletcher would have them carted off. Forcing a grave tone, Kitty managed, “She hit her head rather badly.”

“It is a shame, because she is known as a great walker,” Miss Bingley said a touch too loudly. “And the weather is very fine of late.”

“Indeed. My Mabel and Mr. Collins walk every day.” Mrs. Archer smiled benignly. “But then, they do so in any weather. They cannot seem to spend enough time with one another.”

Cat smirked again.

Where was their tea? The staff knew to have it waiting.

“I do hope for an early winter, though,” Mrs. Hurst said. “Charles has only taken Netherfield Park until the new year, and I would enjoy seeing Hertfordshire covered in snow.”

“Oh, but once your brother and I marry, I will persuade him to purchase this lovely estate.” Cat’s gesture took in the room. “After all, Mabel will someday have Longbourn, making this location auspicious for us.”

“Then she and Mr. Collins have an understanding?” Miss Bingley asked.

All three Miss Archers laughed their tittering, practiced laughs, while Mrs. Archer smiled with indulgence, then said, “Nothing official, but it is only a matter of days, if not hours, until he proposes.”

Kitty thought it rather a matter of miles, for surely he would not propose without writing to his patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, for her thoughts on the union. Not that Kitty saw any hope in that direction. Had Mr. Collins not said he sought a wife among his cousins at Lady Catherine’s urging?

Fortunately, their tea arrived then. Kitty sat forward as Miss Bingley prepared the tea and then began to serve, starting with Mrs. Archer. Eagerness bubbled up and Kitty squeezed her hands closed over nervous anticipation. She would be served last, which gave her two opportunities to dump tea on Cat.

Finally, Miss Bingley said, “Miss Catherine, I do apologize, but I have forgotten how you take your tea.”

Cat smirked back, obviously taking that for the insult Miss Bingley meant it to be. “One sugar and a bit of cream, please, and do not mind your forgetfulness. Soon we will be sisters and you will have ever so much time to learn my habits when you come visit me and Charles.”

Miss Bingley’s answering smile looked brittle enough to shatter.

“Oh, I nearly forgot,” Kitty exclaimed to the room at large. She leaned down to pull free the basket of mending from under the couch, listening to Miss Bingley add the sugar. Setting the basket beside her, away from Cat, Kitty made a show of searching for the book she’d hidden within. A study of the best views in Cornwall. Not especially relevant to anything she’d discussed with the Archers, but near enough. From the corner of her eye, she watched Miss Bingley reach for the cream.

Kitty tensed. The moment Cat took the tea, Kitty would swing around with the book and knock it into Cat’s cup. Tea would go all over her.

If that failed, Kitty would need to be clumsy with her own cup, but she preferred the book idea, deeming it less suspicious than simply pouring tea on the other woman.

Miss Bingley lifted the tea.

“I found a book I thought you might enjoy.” Kitty’s voice was louder than she liked, nervousness rattling through her as she readied to swing the book like a cricket bat.

“It is simply not true,” a voice screeched somewhere down the hallway.

Miss Mabel’s voice.

Cat came to her feet, her expression alarmed.

A mumbled male rumble answered Miss Mabel, unintelligible at a distance.

Miss Bingley, teacup half extended, met Kitty’s gaze with a look that clearly asked, ‘What now?’

Across from Kitty, Miss Archer stood as well. “Was that Mabel?”

Footfalls sounded and Netherfield Park’s butler appeared in the doorway, clearly harried. “A Mr. Collins, accompanied by Miss Mabel, insists on seeing Mrs. Archer.”