Page 135 of Unchained

“Alright, let me grab Bowie,” he tells me as he heads back to the stable.

“Don’t leave me here!” I shout after him.

“Just don’t move and she won’t.”

My heart races; it’s like time moves in slow motion. “Okay, Penny. Stay exactly where you are and please, for the love of God, do not move an inch,” I say sweetly.

It’s not long before Colten arrives with a horse that's way bigger than Penny. A deep gold body with a black mane and tail. He straddles the horse and trots beside me.

“Now what do I do?” I ask, frozen. Everything Colten tried to tell me on the way here has been erased from my memory.

“Gently squeeze your calves. To turn, gently turn and pull the reins back toward your hip. And relax. Okay?”

I nod, squeezing my legs, and she starts to move. A smile erupts on my face.

“Just follow me; she will probably do most of the work for you. Enjoy yourself. Don’t let any thoughts into your brain. This is about you finding freedom.”

I blow him a kiss, and he chuckles, his horse in front of mine, and it doesn't take long for me to not just enjoy this, but absolutely love every single second.

He takes us past the barn and out onto the fields that go off into the horizon for miles. The sun is above the mountains in the distance, the warm air brushing across my face. And he’s right; my mind is free.

The cows are grazing in the fields. Just minding their own business. It doesn’t seem like a bad life. Not having to think about anything other than eating and sleeping.

“You good to go a bit faster?” Colt asks from ahead.

“Yeah!” I shout back.

“Firm squeeze, twice,” he reminds me.

I do that, and she starts to close the distance between Colt and me.

“This is fun!” I call out.

Colt turns his neck to look at me, and smiles so wide it makes my heart flutter. “You’re a natural, baby.”

My cheeks heat, and that’s nothing to do with the sun beaming down on us. It’s him. It always is.

A while later, we come to a stop outside the animal shelter and I can’t wait to get off Penny and see my sheep. She can’t come home yet because she needs another round of antibiotics and the vet wants to keep an eye on her. Poor girl, she’s going through it.

Colt helps me dismount Penny, which was the most ungraceful move I’ve ever pulled off, almost toppling to the ground, only saved by Colten grabbing my waist.

As soon as my feet touch the ground, I’m running through the barn doors, right to the back where my girl is. She’s up on her feet by the time I reach her pen, and I quietly open it and drop to the floor in the hay.

“Hey, beautiful girl,” I coo as she limps over to me.

“You’re going through it too, aren’t you?”

I can see the pain in her eyes. She’s struggling, a bit like I am. Just in a different way. She lies down beside me, the same way she did the first time I came here, and I rest my back against the fence.

“You’re in the perfect place to heal, girl. And so am I,” I say with a smile, my eyes burning with tears.

That’s what Sterling Ranch does. It heals. It’s what Colten does. “We’re in the right hands, aren’t we?” I half laugh, stroking the top of her head.

“You’re going to be just fine. And you know what, now that my dad is gone, I’ll be okay too. And then you can come home with me, and we can have so much fun. We can do what we want. And you can be happy. And healthy.”

I swallow the lump in my throat. I don’t know if I’m talking about her or me anymore. Both of us, perhaps?

She lets out a baa, and I close my eyes. The pain will get better. The guilt. The realization that my life is one big manipulation.