Page 43 of Unbound

“I do want to. But I don’t want to leave you, Mamma. Can’t you come with me?”

She smiles sadly and embraces me. Crushes me to her so tightly, I squeal. “I cannot, Luca. But I will always be with you. I will love you forever. Always remember that, won’t you?”

“I’ll try,” I tell her, overwhelmed with sadness. Tears sting my eyes and spill down my cheeks. She wipes them away, kisses their trail, hugs me one more time. This feels like an ending, and it is painful.

“What can you see, Luca?” she asks, standing up by my side. “When you look around right now, what can you see? Not just with your eyes, but with your heart. Look around and tell me.”

I scan our surroundings. Frown as I look down into the valley. “I see the hills. Our house, the village. There’s smoke … I can see smoke down there, Mamma! What’s happening? Is it a bad thing?”

She nods solemnly, stares off down at the settlement. Watches the black smoke curling into the sky. The horse looks up, alarmed, and the sun seems to fade suddenly. I’m cold and scared.

“A bad thing, yes. Don’t look down there, my angel. What else can you see? Anything unusual?”

I grip her hand and tear my eyes away from the valley. From the flames, from the destruction. From whatever is causing the sound of screaming that is now reaching us all the way up here. I notice something else behind her. Something out of place.

“I can see roses,” I tell her, pointing at them. “A whole string of roses, like they’re tied together in a line. Roses don’t grow like that …”

“What color are they?” she asks. “Tell me all about them.”

“They’re all red, Mamma. Red like blood, apart from the leaves. The leaves are silver. Can’t you see them?”

She glances over her shoulder, then shakes her head, her curls swaying. “No, Luca. They’re just for you, I think. You will need to leave soon. It’s the right thing to do. Be brave, be strong. Never kneel, unless it is for love. And remember, aim for peace but always be ready for war, yes? Just like your papà and I have taught you.”

Her hands are on my shoulders, and her eyes are full of tears. She looks from me to the valley down below.

“They’re burning it, Mamma. The monsters are burning it. I want to go and help, but I’m scared of the flames …”

“I know, Luca. There is nothing you can do right now, other than survive. You need to survive because one day you will not be scared. One day the flames will not be able to hurt you. You will walk through fire, and it will not touch you. You will be the one who kills the monsters. Now, listen to me, it’s time for you to go. Take hold of that line of roses and follow it. Use it like a guide rope. See where it leads you. Hold tight, keep walking, and don’t look back. You understand? Don’t look back, and remember, I will always love you. You were always my precious boy, and I am so proud of you. Now, go on. Do as I say.”

I don’t want to leave her. I’m scared and sad, and I want to stay here. Even if there is a bad thing happening, I want to stay here. She stands, holds my hands. Crouches down to gaze into my eyes. She kisses me on both cheeks.

“I have to go now, Luca, and so do you. Follow the roses. I love you.”

I cry out as she remounts the stallion, rearing up on his back legs and neighing before he gallops away with her. I am alone. My mother has left me, and I don’t know what to do.

I love you, Luca, the other voice says in my head. I love you so much. Please come home. Please don’t leave me.

She sounds sad. Like she’s been crying. Maybe she’s alone too. Maybe she’s scared, and I can help her. I want to help her.

The chain of roses is wavering in the breeze, swaying even though it is a calm day. I walk towards them. I grab hold of the end of the row and tug myself along. I follow the roses, and I don’t look back. Just like my mamma told me.

I pull and I tug and I ignore the smell of smoke and the cries and the swirling sense of panic. I fight my way through it, keeping a tight hold, hand over hand, inch by inch. Each rose I touch shimmies and pops, its petals scattering into the air, fluttering around my face and settling on my shoulders. So many that I am covered in them.

The string seems to go on forever. Maybe I’ll never reach the end of it. Maybe I’ll never get back to the woman I’m looking for, and I’ll never see my mamma again, and …

My eyes open. I smell lemons and basil. I feel her hair against my face. Hear her murmuring my name. Rosa. My love, my life. I might not have remembered her name while I was in that other place, but I never forgot her.

She is here. She is real, and I am back where I belong. I fight off a moment of sadness—the lingering loss of the mother I never even knew. The loss of the sunlight I know I will never feel again. It doesn’t matter. It’s all worth it to be back with Rosa.

I’m in my room at court, and she is lying on top of me in a fitful sleep. Her limbs are splayed protectively around my whole body, covering as much of me as she possibly can. Keeping me safe, never letting me go. Always calling me, always pulling me back. I am home, because Rosa is my home.

I lay both my hands on her ass and stroke the rounded curve. Home indeed. She murmurs, lifts her head to stare at me.

“Am I dead and in heaven?” I ask, squeezing her butt. “Because I’m pretty sure this is what heaven would feel like …”

She grins, the delight clear on her face. There are tear tracks on her cheeks, and I can see the stress she’s been enduring. “You’re back. And you look like you again.”

“How long was I out?”