Page 3 of Mine After Midnight

Now

It feels weird being back in Black Water Cove.

My Vans scuff along the cracked pavement of Main Street. Hardly anything has changed here, but at the same time, so much is different. I pass the old cinema on my left, its faded sign barely legible now. I remember sneaking in here when I was twelve, hiding from the world with a borrowed book from the local library in my popcorn-smelling fingers. Now the glass is grimy, the paint peeling, and I feel a little sad at how unloved and old it looks. It seems that a lot of things in town have faced a similar fate.

People pass me by, nodding politely or staring a little too long. The coffee shop door squeaks when someone opens it, espresso smells wafting out. I catch a glimpse of myself reflected in the window, a familiar face and a stranger all at once. My hair’s longer than it used to be, but still that strawberry blonde, my freckles are as pronounced as ever, and my eyes the same green they’ve always been, but there’s a sad, haunted look about me that wasn’t there when I was a teenager.

A breeze kicks up, rustling the faded banners that hang across the street, and for a second I imagine I could just turn around, walk back to the highway and keep driving, but something inside me keeps my feet moving forward. This town has its claws in me, whether I like it or not. I wonder where I’d be if things were different, and we had stayed.

A laugh drifts from the corner near the old newsagent. I look up. Ryan Jones is strolling towards me with the same crooked grin I remember from high school. He’s taller than I remember; his hair is darker than it used to be. I had a giant crush on him through most of school.

‘Bryn?’ His voice is uncertain, as though he’s not sure it’s actually me he’s talking to.

‘Ryan,’ I say.

His brows lift. ‘Wow, it’s been ages! How’ve you been?’

‘Yeah,’ I say, shrugging. My hands fidget with the strap of my bag. ‘Good, thanks. I’m just visiting.’

He rubs the back of his neck, as if wanting to continue the conversation but unsure how to put his thoughts into words. ‘Cool. How’s your family?’ he says eventually.

I glance down at the cracked pavement, chewing my lip as I take a second to gather my thoughts.

‘They’re fine. No one lives here anymore,’ I say.

There’s a pause, an awkward space filled only by the sounds of the busy street. We used to banter with each other. Laugh and flirt. Write each other notes in class. Now years have passed, and we are strangers.

‘Are you visiting Elodie and Tess? Are you still friends?’ Ryan asks, shifting the weight from one foot to the other, as though he is unsure quite what to do with himself.

‘Yeah, we’ve stayed in touch.’

‘Must be nice, seeing familiar faces after all this time,’ he says. The corners of his smile dip slightly, like he’s trying to lighten the mood, but failing.

‘Yeah,’ I reply, searching for the right words. Being back here is harder than I expected. Everything reminds me of her.

He studies me for a moment, the way he used to in high school. It’s as if he’s trying to figure out who I am now versus who I was back then.

‘You’ve changed,’ he says softly.

‘Naturally,’ I say, a little stiffly. ‘It’s been five years.’

Ryan releases an awkward chuckle. ‘I guess that’s a while.’

I nod, feeling the weight of that truth settle over me. The streets, the old buildings – they all bring memories back. Some I’m ready to face, some I’m not.

‘I should probably let you go see your friends, but if you want to catch up over coffee, or just want someone to talk to, you know where to find me.’

I nod, surprised at how little excitement I feel, considering how over the moon I would have been if he’d asked me back in high school. ‘Thanks, Ryan. I might take you up on that sometime.’

He gives me a small smile before turning toward the cafe. I keep walking, letting the chatter of the street fade out behind me. My steps slow as I approach the park at the edge of town. The grass is a vibrant green, the swings creak in the slight breeze, and for a moment, it’s as if time hasn’t touched this place at all.

I stop at the edge of the playground, remembering us here, laughing, her hair tangled in the wind. She’d chase me around until we collapsed on the grass, breathless and dizzy. I remember the way she used to tug me along, fearless, daring me to climb higher, swing faster. I blink rapidly, trying to hold back tears for my sister.

Moving to sit on the edge of the swing set, I let myself sink into the quiet. The park is empty now, but I can hear her voice in my head, the echo of her laughter that never really left me. I draw in a shaky breath, trying to ground myself. The past isn’t here anymore, but the pain is still real. A soft breeze rustles the leaves above, and I close my eyes. For a moment, it almost feels like she’s still here with me.

When I stand, brushing off my jeans, I know I have to keep moving forward. Being back in Black Water Cove doesn’t need to be heavy and sad. I’m looking forward to seeing Tess and Elodie. I’ve seen them plenty since moving to Brisbane – they’ve visited quite a few times – but I haven’t been back here myself. Not until now.

Elodie’s twenty-first felt like a good enough reason to finally make the trip, and Tess could use a friend after everything that’s happened since her breakup. I don’t know how long I plan to stay, and that’s okay. For once, I don’t need a plan. I’m just going to go with the flow and see what happens.