Page 291 of Awakened

“What’s wrong with you?”

The words fall out before I can think, but I’m even more shocked by Daxen’s reaction than by the fact that I even care.

He flinches.

Since the day we met, I’ve never seen Dax flinch away from anything. Never. Not once.

It’s so out of character that I can’t wrap my head around it. Still shocked, I fall back into my chair and stare at him as he struggles to pull himself back together.

He clears his throat, picks up some papers, and shuffles them around before shoving them into a folder sitting open in front of him. His eyes flick up and meet mine before darting away again.

“Nothing. I’m fine.”

Oh, we’re lying to ourselves again? Perfect.

“Yeah, Daxen, you’re fine. Especially when you’ve got innocent Omegas to terrorize. Even better when they can’t fight back, am I right?”

The room freezes. I clench my jaw, but refuse to take it back. I’ve been looking forward to a fight the whole way here, and if I can’t fight Varenthrall, then Dax and Vae are the next best things.

They hurt her the most next to him, after all. In some ways, they hurt her worse. They’re her Fated fucking Mates, but they hurt her over and over and over again.

I wait for Dax to fight back, but the heavy silence persists. Next to me, Soren clears his throat to get my attention, inclining his head in solidarity when I glance over at him.

The silence goes on for what feels like forever. Right as I’m about to open my mouth and ask about the bloody box on the table, Daxen finally lifts his head and looks at me.

“Do you think I don’t know that I’m the monster in this story?” His voice is rough. Broken. He sighs, and the sound is so full of self-loathing it throws me.

Only for a moment, though. Then I remember what he did to my Omega. Our Omega.

“I think you don’t fucking care that you nearly broke my Mate,” I snap back. “I think you care more about being right than you do about doing what’s right. I think neither of you,” I glare at Vae, making sure he knows I’m including him in this as well, “have even bothered to offer my Omega a fucking apology in the last week and a half.”

Vae’s mouth opens, but I cut him off. “Fucking save it, Vaelenor. I know you two think you’ve somehow gotten away with treating Idril like trash, but you haven’t. I’ve been more concerned with her since I woke up than with the two of you—but she’s not here right now. I can’t work on healing all the shit you two broke in her until she comes back, so you’re going to listen to what I fucking say.”

Neither male spoke, but Gav cut in. “Caelan, I know you’re mad⁠—”

“Respectfully… you don’t know shit,” I snap, turning my glare on my leader.

“You sanctioned all this bullshit. You handed her off to Cage. You gave these two free fucking rein to do as they pleased. Did you even consider sitting down and talking to her? Did you even think to verify her claims or find out her story?”

Gav’s jaw ticks. “I was more concerned with you. You were dying, Caelan, and I had to look at the facts.”

“Fuck your facts, too, Gavran! That’s the fucking problem here—your ‘facts’ were just shit that this one,” I gesture toward Dax, “decided mattered. The fucking fact is, you all decided before you’d even met my Mate that she was the enemy, and you treated her like one. Someone needs to fight for that girl, and while it should have been my Pack and the people I trusted the most, it wasn’t.”

The words suck out the last of my adrenaline, and now I just feel defeated. Weighed down and bone-weary. The anger is no longer enough to keep me going, and now all that’s left are the intense feelings of betrayal and pain.

And maybe that’s what I’m truly feeling. Betrayed.

Not because I thought we caught Varenthrall and I’m disappointed he’s not here, but because I’m finally being forced to face the fact that, despite believing for hundreds of years, my Pack—the males I’ve called family—aren’t who I thought they were. And every time I think I’ve got it out of my system, the pain comes roaring back with a vengeance.

“We have a lot to apologize for,” Dax says, laying his palms flat on the table in front of him. He stares at me with eyes filled with shame and guilt, but even that’s hard for me to believe.

“You’re right, Caelan, about all of it. We fucked up. I fucked up. I know it doesn’t matter, but I had a reason for that—something I’ve not told you about.”

My jaw clenches so tight I’m afraid I might break a molar. Do I even care about his excuses?

The answer comes right away.

No. I don’t. Nothing he could say would make up for what he did to Idril. To our Pack. To me.