Page 83 of Only Ever You

Twenty minutes later, I’m behind the steering wheel, my backpack and duffel bag in the back seat. It’s just past six, and practice doesn’t start until seven thirty, but I was too restless to stay home.

I drive aimlessly, but within minutes, I find myself nearing the rink. It’s ten minutes past six. Her practice starts in twenty minutes, and if I know one thing about her, it’s that she’s never late. I thrum my fingers over the steering wheel, chewing on my bottom lip. It wouldn’t hurt to watch her for a few minutes. Just out of curiosity.

I ignore the fact that I’ve memorized her schedule. I’m here because I’m curious. She placed fifth in the Olympics last February, but now that she’s going to school, can she stay on that level?

I park near the back of the lot and then walk to the entrance. Kellan, the older man who drives the Zamboni, approaches at about the same time.

“Michael? Do you have an early practice today?” he asks, his light blue eyes on me. He has a bushy mustache that twitches when he smiles.

“Uh, no. I woke up early and couldn’t fall asleep, so I came here. Not totally sure why.” I hide my hands in my pockets. “The ice usually calms me down. You think I could sneak in and sit in the stands for a little while?”

“Sure. You’ll get quite a show. Isla Walker reserved the ice this morning. Not sure if you know who she is since she’s new here, but she skated at the Olympics. And she’s really good.”

I flash him a smile. “Really? Then I better hurry. I don’t want to miss out on the opportunity to watch someone at her level skate.”

“You sure don’t.” He claps me on my shoulder as I pass him.

The silence inside the rink sends a zing of excitement through me. She isn’t here yet, which means I can slip into the stands without being noticed.

I just want to watch.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

seven minutes

MICHAEL

Nineteen years old

Music echoes off the walls, the off-campus house vibrating with the rhythm. The bass pulses through the floors and up the wall where I stand, people-watching. It’s not the first party of the year, but it’s the first one the guys on the team have made it to. After the way Coach nearly ran us into the ground this week, we need the break.

The place is packed, the drinks flowing. I usually have a good time at these things, but typically, Isla Walker isn’t in attendance. Tonight, I’m not that lucky.

“You don’t look like you’re having fun,” Asher says, shoving a plastic cup into my hand. “Maybe this will cheer you up.”

I take the beer from him, still surveying the crowd of people. “I’m fine.”

“Clearly.” He moves to stand beside me. “Is it because Isla is gonna be here?”

“Asher,” I warn him in a cutting tone.

“Fuck, why are you so difficult?” He groans, dragging a hand through his blond hair. “She’s not out to get you. She’s moved on. Why can’t you?”

I bark a humorless laugh and take a slow sip of my drink, letting the burn settle in my chest.

“Moved on?” I ask. “You mean how she pretends I don’t exist every time I see her?”

“She’s just being civil, man.”

“Yeah?” I clench my jaw so hard, it aches. “Doesn’t feel all that civil.” I told myself I wouldn’t talk about her, yet here I am, my thoughts consumed once again. “She doesn’t look at me, Ash. She looks through me. Like I’m fucking air. So don’t tell me she’s ‘moved on.’”

He studies me, head tilted, a depth of understanding in his eyes. He knows me too well. It makes it hard to hide my emotions from him—not that I really try.

“Maybe she’s trying to protect herself,” he finally says. “Maybe it’s not about you.”

I gulp down my drink and heave out a breath as the alcohol lights my insides on fire. “Why didn’t you tell me you two kept in touch?”

He holds my gaze, not an ounce of shame in his. “You haven’t mentioned her once since she moved to Boston. Not unless someone asked about her, and then you acted like she betrayed you. Why would I want to bring it up?” He shrugs. “Besides, ‘staying in touch’ is a bit of a stretch. We’d DM each other here and there, but sometimes, we’d go weeks between conversations. Most of our interactions were her posting and me reacting. Like the anime festival she went to when she was in Tokyo. That one was cool, so I DMed her about it.”