Page 28 of Once I Find You

Crap. How the hell would she have noticed I deleted those? They were old comments, but they were ones I was worried might incriminate Kane by accident, so I went back and took them down. I actually took a lot down… “Do you think I should call her? I mean I can explain why and maybe she’ll join the chat after?”

“Yeah, call her. I told her she’s just being paranoid. It isn’t like you’re keeping anything from us, we’ve been doing this together from the beginning anyway, right?”

God I’m so bad at faking! Act natural!

“Yes! Of course not. I’ll call her now.” I hop off the video call and take a deep breath. What the hell?! Why would Gabi even tell them that? Is that why she texted me to ask to compare notes? Was she testing me?

I pick up my phone and dial Gabi, and it only rings a couple of times until she answers. “Hey, I probably won’t make it to the call, I have some family things going on tonight,” she says, already about to hang up.

“Wait! I just uh, Wen told me you were wondering about my comments, so I just wanted to explain myself.”

“Okay.”

“Okay…right. I just…you know since I was wrong about Peter Reed I realized I must have messed up somewhere down the line. I wanted to delete everything that I wasn’t sure about, so no one else got thrown off too. That’s all!”

“I see.”

Oh my god. She sees right through me, doesn’t she?

She’s quiet for a moment, then continues. “Don’t worry about it. Sorry, I should’ve just texted you. I just really wanna figure this out, you know? It’s important to me.”

“I didn’t realize you were that serious about it,” I say. Had she always been like that? I thought she was doing it for fun like Alyssa and Wen.

“Well, I am. But I shouldn’t have done that behind your back. All good, right?”

“Uh yeah, for sure.”

We exchange awkward goodbyes, and I hang up. Maybe I was being weird. I should be more careful next time. I’m terrible at this “discreet” thing. Oh well.

When I get back on the video call, Alyssa and Wen barely care about the conversation I had with Gabi, so I forget about it too. As we ate our own dinners, we end up talking about a bunch of different cases, and eventually watched the new documentary series that came out this week.

I really missed these nights. I think I needed this distraction to decompress after everything that’s happened with Kane. But…I also feel anxious. If, let’s say, Kane and I end up together, what does that mean for him and what he does? Does he stop killing? Do I have to protect him forever and hide it from everyone?

I need to get to know him more. I respect what he does, and his agenda. I agree someone has to do something about the tens of thousands of evil people who walk among us…but I’m scared of losing him. He doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who would sacrifice his freedom forever. He must know when the end would be for him.

Maybe it can be me?

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

We Didn’t Even Really Have Sex!

KANE

“Just get your ass in the truck,” I grumble, tossing Mason’s duffle bag into the backseat of the truck.

“Jeez, what’s up your ass?” Mason laughs as he hops in.

“You know it’s the crack of dawn, and you’re already here complaining about my truck, joking about this and that⁠—”

“Whatever, how about I make it up to you by buying you some breakfast?”

I can’t say no to food. I could go for a big platter right now.

Mason goes on and on as we drive from the airport, telling me about everything he’s been up to the last few years. He left the army not too long after me, and if I had to guess, I think the real reason was that he saw how fucked up I was after what happened to Mel and Sadie, and he didn’t want to end up stuck somewhere far from anyone he loved. At least someone can learn from my mistakes.

He’s been working as a private trainer in some fancy gym, so he loves bragging about all the ladies he gets to be around. Don’t get me wrong, Mason is a stand-up guy. I had to teach him to be when he came under my wing at the ripe age of eighteen; but he can be a damn shameless playboy when he wants to be.

Regardless, I’m just happy he’s figuring himself out. He’s only twenty-seven now, so he has a long way to go. He doesn’t have much family to speak of, so I feel like I accidentally adopted him when he joined the army.