Page 62 of Maybe I’m the Problem

“Pinkie, you okay?” My club manager asked.

“I’m fine. If anyone comes looking for me, tell them I’m busy.”

I went into my office and cleared out my safe. When you were a woman like myself, you couldn’t just go to someone and tell them you needed help because a nigga would leave you alone. Everyone knew who I was and they knew I was wanted by every nigga in the city. I was a side bitch. They would take me for a joke and laugh in my face.

“Listen to me,” I told my manager. “I’m going to be gone for a little while. Don’t tell anybody shit. I’ll still be available by phone and email. If someone asks, yes you saw me today but no, you don’t know where the fuck I’m at. Are we clear?”

“Yes ma’am. Can I help in any way?”

“Just do what I asked.”

44. SUMMER

The smell of my house as I walked in with my daughter gave me peace. I had been away from the house for so long that it was the little things that made me appreciate it. The smell of the plug-ins, the sky that shined brightly in the foyer and the sound of the wind chimes in the back yard. One thing I didn’t miss was, Law.

He helped his mother get the stuff out of her car. He requested to come and get us but I denied it and asked for his mama to come instead. Law was looking sexy as hell with a fresh haircut and shit. Even that couldn’t make me want his ass. All I saw was a cheater when I looked at him.

“Thank you, Ms. Mae, for everything,” I stressed.

“Don’t be petty. She wouldn’t be doing shit if you would let me do it,” Law stated.

“You’re welcome baby. I’m about to run to the grocery store so I can cook you something and I’ll be back.”

I grabbed the car seat that my baby was in but Law grabbed it.

“You don’t need to be picking anything up. I’ll take her wherever you trying to go with her.”

“I was going upstairs to go lay down.”

I put her baby bed in the master suite until she gets adjusted. I wasn’t sure if you were going to want me to stay, so I could help. Just in case you didn’t, that would prevent you from walking down the hall to get her.”

“Thank you.” I climbed the steps slowly as he followed behind me.

He had really fixed everything up nice and easy for me. I wouldn’t have to go out of the room for anything. Law had a feeling that I was going to ask him to leave but I had already decided not to. He could stay and help me with the baby but as long as he knew we were not a couple.

“Where you want me to put her? In the bed with you or in her bed?” Law asked as he got her from her seat.

“You can bring her to me. I hadn’t spent much time with her in the hospital.”

“I can’t believe we made her.”

“Yea, we did. Shit crazy how it ended though. Never saw that shit coming.”

“Can we not.”

“I’m not about to argue with you, Law. I was just saying. By the way, you can sleep in the guest room so you can help me with her. As long as you know we are not together and we are not working on being back together.”

“I don’t understand why we can’t work on being back together.”

“Because I don’t want to be with you anymore, Law. If I keep taking you back when you mess up, how does that make me look? I’m not your wife, so we have nothing making me work this shit out. I hate that we couldn’t be together and raise our daughter together but that was your mistake, not mine. When I’m able to get back to work, I’ll be moving into my own place again.”

“Man, fuck that! What the fuck kind of nigga you think I am? You not about to move out of this house to go stay some damn where else. I’ll fucking leave. My daughter deserves the best. Don’t come out your mouth about leaving and shit again.”

“What does it matter?”

“It matters, okay.”

“Whatever. Close my damn door when you leave out.”