Page 73 of Steele

“Blow, but listen, this is the last time.” He leaned in and whispered. “I owed a favor. I made a mistake and pissed off the wrong people. Brother, I’m trying to clean this mess up. I got in too deep, too fast. If I want out, I have to make one more drop.”

“Fuck you, Kodiak. That isn’t how these people play.”

“You don’t know these people. And you don’t want to. Stay out of this. I’ve got it handled.”

“The fact that you think you do shows you don’t know shit. You don’t work your way out. It’s fucking bloody. We know. So fuck you and fuck whoever you’re working with. We were out. We fought to leave that shit behind. We fought—”

“For what?” he snapped back. “We fought for this?” He indicated the clubhouse with a sweep of his arms. “I’m dying inside, Steele. I miss the good days.”

“Good days?” I crowded into his space. “Tommy is dead. Roach is dead. I’d fucking spit on Snow’s and Wrench’s graves for what they did to the club. We were out!”

“Not everything was shit. We were a club. We had loyalty, but then we left guys behind, guys that wanted out from under Wrench just as much as we did. They weren’t the enemy, but we fucked them over.” He softened the bite of his tone. “Just because we made it out doesn’t make us better than them.”

“You and I remember life with the Crawlers differently.” Emotions boiled in my gut and crawled into my throat. “You swore loyalty to the Hellers. This is your club.”

“I’m beginning to think maybe it isn’t.”

“You’re riding a bike with this club’s colors, and you’ve got their fucking patch on your back.” I ran my hands over my head. “Fuck. I have the patch on my back.”

Jazzy and Hana wore cuts. Stormy had little girls in her dance studio next to Crew Custom Cycle. Where our fucking colors hung in the window.

“I bring Lili and Jaymi to the club. This is what I want. I thought I was done looking over my shoulder. I thought Natalie was the only one out to fuck me over. Now, I find out my best friend is betraying his club.”

“Calm the fuck down,” Kodiak said. “I’ve got it handled. One more run. One last delivery.”

“Nah. You sneaking around at four in the fucking morning says everything. Does Vega know what you’re doing?”

“No, and you shouldn’t know, either. I never wanted you in on this.” He clutched the brick in his hands. He grew quiet, and a muscle ticked in his jaw. “Just back off on this.”

“I don’t know what to say to you. You call me brother. That’s supposed to mean something. Seems like all you care about is yourself. Fuck you, Kodiak. I love you, but I don’t want this shit in my life.” I wanted something good with Lili and Jaymi. I wanted life in the MC and nights in Jaymi’s bed.

“Maybe the Hellers aren’t the right club for me.”

There was no maybe about it. I just wished he could see what he was giving up. I turned and stalked away. “Then walk away. When Blade finds out, you’re out anyway.”

“Fuck that. If he finds out, I go out bad. I lose you. I lose Vega. I lose my reputation.”

I kept walking.

“He won’t find out if you don’t say anything. Don’t put me out, Steele. I’ve been there for you.”

I’d nearly made it out of the chapel when his words found me in the darkness of the corridor.

I wasn’t ready to go to Blade or the board, but I needed to talk to Bullet and Vega. I was pissed. Hellers weren’t looking for trouble, but Kodiak was. After tonight, no doubt, he’d found it.

I was angry, but he was right. I couldn’t turn my back on him. We had too much history together. But staying quiet betrayed my club, and I couldn’t do that either. I guess karma wasn’t done fucking me over.

Chapter Eleven

Jaymi

Jay Swings was busy for a Saturday afternoon. Between sips of soda, I updated my brother on the state of the lawsuits. “I spoke with my attorney a couple days ago. He’s drawn up the settlement agreement. We’re still in mediation, but if Astrid doesn’t accept, we’ll end up in court before a judge.”

Ryan shifted his gaze from the game on the television over my head to my face. “What did you offer?”

“The settlement from the life insurance would be equivalent to standard monthly support based on Jeff’s income at the time of his death minus the death benefits she’ll get from his social security. He’d owe support if he was still here.”

Tension tightened Ryan’s mouth. “If he was still here, I’d kick his ass.”