Page 85 of Knox

“Yeah, me too.”

“Can I be with the team when you tell them?”

Ugh…

The thought of admitting my feelings, of having to say them out loud, makes my stomach turn with a mix of guilt and anxiety.

“I’m never telling them.”

“Oh, come on,” Björn chuckles. “The contract won’t last forever, Knox. Once this mess is cleared up, you can become Mrs. Cillian if you want.”

“Why the fuck would I be the Mrs.?”

Björn grins, wiggling his brows. “So you are a top, then.”

I roll my eyes but don’t confirm or deny, knowing how much that will annoy Björn. “Anyway, I’m not telling the team because there’s nothing to tell. Even when this assignment ends, you know why I can’t stay with Cillian.”

Björn’s grin fades, and he turns serious. “Cillian isn’t him.”

I don’t answer that.

I know he is nothing like that monster. But I just can’t.

I can’t help but feel like every step I take toward Cil is a step I take away from my family.

From the memory of my mother.

From her pain.

“I’m not bringing it up to make you beat yourself up, Knox. I’m telling you so you can finally let it go.”

“Okay,” I say, and I know the word feels inadequate, but I don’t know what else to say… no matter how deeply grateful I am to him.

“Anyway.” Björn pats my shoulder. “I think the best way to keep Cillian alive right now is keeping him off the grid here until the island trip.”

“Agreed.”

“Great! I’ll brief the team and head back in four days to pick you both up. You have a burner that can’t be traced?”

“Always.”

“Keep it close. We’ll send updates as they come in. If shit hits the fan, just text a dot, and we’ll move on your position.”

“Got it.” I nod.

“Want me to grab anything from your house for the gala?”

“Yeah. Ask Damián to pick out my suit.”

“I can grab it for you.” Björn smiles.

“Fuck no. The last time you picked my clothes, I had to extract a hostage in a walrus onesie.”

“That was your fault for having that shit in your closet.” Björn laughs. “There’s no way I could see that beauty and not pick it.”

“My niece gave it to me.” I glare at the asshole.

“She gave it to us, because wow, it was awesome seeing you in it.”