Page 38 of Driven By Impulse

He was rambling. He knew he was rambling, because he was way too aware of Nicco at his back, of the sudden warmth of the room when Hanna was asleep upstairs and they were edging into dangerous truth territories. He reached for the handle on the shower and started the hot stream of water, which quickly began to steam up the glass.

“You go ahead, I can use the one upstairs.”

Nicco shook his head. “You’ve clearly been coveting this shower for over a decade. Far be it from me to take it from you.”

He was a predator in the night. Ash knew how Nicco could be with women when he wanted, which did seem to be less and less in recent months. But he would pitch his voice low, the soft rumble coming from his belly, his eyes dark, his full fucking lips swollen and bee-stung.

“I’m offering,” he managed. Because the second Ash got into the shower, his hand was going straight to his cock, and he needed to be as far away from Nicco as possible for that.

Or as close.

Nicco took another step closer, and Ash felt the air go out of the room. This was so much worse than being pressed against each other in a closet where there was nowhere to go. At least then he hadn’t had to look Nicco in the eye before being devoured. At least then they could pretend that whatever might have been happening definitely wasn’t happening.

But this, in the gilded green bathroom, with the steam fogging up the glass and mirrors, this was something else entirely. This was an edge, and Nicco was asking if he wanted to take the plunge and Ash had never once in his life been able to back down from a challenge.

“Or…” His own voice was rough as sandpaper, grating with desire and need and want so intense Ash was sure Nicco heard every scraping syllable.

Nicco raised a brow. “Or?”

Ash squared his shoulders, bringing himself to his full height. He’d always had an inch or so on Nicco, but right now, Nicco felt every bit the predator. “Or we could share…” He made a show of glancing over at the shower. “It’s a big shower. Plenty of space.”

Nicco licked his lips. “Tell me about Ralston first,” he said. “Then I’ll share the shower with you.”

Ash swallowed, tendrils of fear and panic mingling with the rush of white-hot desire to see Nicco in the steam, to see how secret needs whispered in dark corners stood up to the light, to know, just once, just for himself, if there was anything real or true to the need he felt every time Nicco was close, or if it had been some kind of savior syndrome all along.

Right. That’s definitely it.

Ash opened his mouth, and for a moment all he felt was the cloying steam from the shower. But Nicco didn’t push, didn’t tease, didn’t even step closer. He just let Ash find the words.

“Ralston Junior, the father… He was my foster dad before Wil took me in.”

Nothing much seemed to surprise Nicco, not even the fact that Ash had known about the kiss he and Hanna had shared, but that revelation clearly caught him off guard.

“For how long?” he asked.

Ash grimaced. “Almost two years. You know, I was in the system since I was a little kid, but by the time I was a teenager, I was mean and angry and desperate for someone to love me, just…a little.”

His voice cracked on the last, and he could have sworn he saw Nic’s eyes going glassy.

“Wil did,” Ash reassured him. “And Hanna too. They were… They were my family. I got out all right, in the end. Before I found you.”

Nicco nodded. “But.”

Ash bit his lip. He didn’t like to talk about this part. The only reason Hanna knew was because she had been the one to drag him from the dirt and muck, to find him at his most vulnerable and bring him back into the land of the living. “Ralston was the old-fashioned version of his son, if that makes sense. Junior, he really believed what he preached, no politics, no power grabbing, just him and the Lord and the flock he swore to protect.”

“You say that like it’s a good thing,” Nicco murmured. “Not much difference between the churches.”

Because of course, Niccolo Castiglione knew all about the power of the church.

Ash let out an agonized laugh. “It’s better than whatever his son has going on. At least with the fervent, you can always expect the next play. Ralston, he wanted to save our sinning souls. And he would do that by any means necessary. His son…his son is after something so much bigger than salvation.”

“What did he do to you?” Nicco’s voice was very, very dark, and Ash felt a shiver run up his spine. The only time Nicco ever sounded like that was when he was right at the edge of losing control.

Ash unbuttoned his shirt, just for something to do with his shaking fingers. “Even back then, they were already running a school through the church. Tripp’s a lot older than we are, and he was one of my teachers at the time.” He grimaced. “Hope he leads better than he teaches.”

Nicco growled. “Ash.”

Ash sighed. “Fine. Okay. He caught me with one of the other boys behind the stable after school. Kid’s name was Michael, good Bible boy, of course. Thought we’d…test out the nature of human sin together.”