Page 52 of Fractured Ice

"She seems nice." She runs a hand through her hair. "I'm actually pretty tired. The game, the travel. I'm going to head upstairs."

"You don't have to⁠—"

"I'm tired." She looks at me, and her expression is perfectly neutral, perfectly controlled. I'd almost prefer it if she looked angry because at least anger means she cares about what she's seeing. "Thanks for inviting me. It was fun."

She finds Rory, says something to her, and Rory offers to come with her, but Sienna waves to the group and picks up her bag and is gone.

I sit there.

Knox comes to sit next to me, and he doesn't say anything for a second, which is new.

"Tough break," he finally offers.

"Not helpful."

"I know." He looks at where she'd been sitting. "The Jamie thing was⁠—"

"I know what the Jamie thing was."

"It was bad."

"Knox."

"I'm agreeing with you." He leans back in his chair. "You were doing really well tonight. She was having a good time."

"I know she was."

"And then⁠—"

"I was there, man." I pull out my phone. "I saw it happen."

I text her. I know I shouldn't, I know texting her immediately is exactly the wrong move, and I should think it through. I do it anyway because it's that or sit here and stew, and sitting here and stewing isn't producing anything useful.

That was not what it looked like. I don't want you to think…

I delete the draft.

She came up to me, I didn't invite her. I'm sorry you had to see it.

Send.

I watch the delivered receipt sit there. No response.

I try again, five minutes later.

You were having fun. Come back downstairs. She's gone.

Nothing.

I know how it looked. I'm sorry.

Still nothing.

The room continues around me, getting louder, somebody is starting another card game, a video game argument resuming, and I'm sitting in the middle of it watching my phone not get a response, thinking about her face right after Jamie kissed me, the way everything closed off, the way weeks of whatever we'd been building had just disappeared.

The night wraps up the way team nights do, gradually and loudly, guys filtering out, someone finishing a game, the snacks gone and the cards scattered. By the time the room fully clears out I've sent three texts that have gone unanswered and I've replayed the Jamie situation from every possible angle and there's no version where it looks better than it looked.

I'm in the hallway when I look at the elevator.