Page 90 of True Blue

My mind feels clear.

The weight that had been sitting on my chest feels almost lighter. The vise around my throat finally lets up. My shoulders drop, my back straightens, and I meet her eyes head-on.

“Haven’t you said enough?” I hiss through gritted teeth. “Haven’t you done enough?!”

Aunt Robin gasps, “Theod⁠—”

“You can shut up too,” I snarl.

I meet every single person’s eyes in this room, these women who follow my mother’s lead.

“This family,” I sneer, shaking my head. “How could I not see it until now. All of you are so fucking pathetic.”

Not that I’m any better.

Not by a long shot.

But this is who I learned from, who I emulated and followed and barked for. Nana and Pop tried as best as they could, and I think there is some good in me from them, but all the rot comes from this house, these people.

My family.

My father appears in the doorway of the foyer, my uncles trailing behind him to see what’s going on. They look around at the pale women and the splattered cake on the floor.

I used to feel pride in my family.

When I was a little kid, my mother always told me I should feel proud that I came from a strong family unit. That my parents were still together, unlike some other people’s parents. That we had a nice home and nice things because we deserved them.

“The most empty and pathetic people on this entire planet—and I include myself in that because I learned from my family,” I scoff. Their shock seems to be wearing off and giving way to indignation. “Look at us—we’re a fucking joke.”

Mom’s eyes are practically bugging out of her head and she looks downright furious. None of the heartbreak, the grieving-daughter act she put on for me.

No, this is who she is.

Nana tried to warn me.

Indie tried to warn me.

And I refused to listen.

I refused to see.

Indie, I’m so fucking sorry, honey.

“Pretty words.”

Indie’s voice in my head hits me like a shot of adrenaline.

“Theodore—” Mom starts.

“Don’t cut me off!” I roar, and she jumps back, startled.

Dad doesn’t even say anything, doesn’t try to defend her. He just watches, shocked, with my uncles, my disrespectful little cousins, and my aunts, all gaping at me.

I sneer, “’Always put family first, Theo. Blood is thicker than water, Theo. Family is everything, Theo.’ Fuck this family! A bunch of image-obsessed clowns and useless men.”

That hits my Dad’s nerve, because he tries to shout, “That’s enough out of you, boy⁠—”

“Oh, yeah? Now it’s enough, Dad?” I laugh, charging up to him. “Call me a sissy! Call me a faggot like you used to when I cried! Call me a little girl! Come on! Say it to my fucking face!”