Page 15 of A Promise Made

There were several more repetitions of thanks and farewells before Darcy finally made his exit.

* * *

Mr Bennet felt sadly deflated.

Darcy had left for his own estate, as had always been planned.

If Darcy had in reality been his son, he would not have left; his own estate would have been Longbourn.

All the hard work Darcy had put in was paying off, and Mr Bennet knew that he was meant to carry on the project. But he also knew that what had been so pleasant and fulfilling when done alongside Darcy would be a chore alone.

He remembered how useful Lizzy could be, in these sorts of matters. She would probably be overjoyed to be needed again.

And now that Darcy would no longer be here, she would not seem so tiresome.

For the first time he realised that, more than anything, Lizzy had been jealous of the time he spent with Darcy and envious of the bond between the two men.

Yes, that was surely it. Things would go back to the usual pre-Darcy state, but with the huge and satisfying difference that there were far fewer worries about money and the future. If this upcoming meeting Darcy had scheduled went well….

Mr Bennet found his place in the excellent biography he was reading, and he settled down for a very pleasurable few hours.

Chapter Fourteen

Lizzy had noticed something significant. Mr Darcy had said he was not going on a pleasure jaunt with his host, but instead was going somewhere for a serious reason—of course, Lizzy thought wryly, when was he not serious? At that point, she had seen him cast weighted looks at both of her parents. And they, in turn, gave meaningful looks right back at him.

This outing Mr Darcy mentioned had importance that his parents somehow understood, and Lizzy was determined to discover it. She had not dressed in boy’s clothes in quite a while, but she still had a pile of servant’s clothes meant for a young man neatly hidden behind the pickle barrel, by the pantry. Taking advantage of the hubbub around the farewells to Mr Darcy, she darted towards the kitchen, locked herself into the pantry, and changed clothes. She hid her gown behind the substantial flour sack, and she laced up her half boots.

Then she darted out to the stables, where she carefully avoided the groom and the stable master, both of whom were lounging in an empty stall, playing All Fours.

Lady was currently out in the paddock, nibbling dried grasses, and Lizzy swiftly saddled the mare. Once mounted, she spurred Lady to race through a meadow in an attempt to catch up with Mr Darcy. It turned out that he was not far ahead, and so Lizzy ended up slowing down, holding Lady back, and even hiding behind trees and shrubberies whenever necessary.

She watched Mr Darcy reach Netherfield, and she was surprised but pleased to see that she would not have to skulk around the estate waiting for the outing to start, as Mr Saunders was already outside with his saddled gelding, checking the tack.

Mr Darcy dismounted, but only for a minute. He hurried to the conservatory, and when he exited the glasshouse, he was holding a large bouquet of flowers. They were partially covered with a protective cloth, and as Lizzy took a slow skirting path around the stables, keeping the men in sight, she watched Mr Darcy carefully thrust the bound stems of the bouquet into a saddlebag.

Mr Darcy had said it was a grave matter, and he had emphasised the word grave…And now he had flowers…. Was it possible that Mr Darcy had been speaking literally, and that he and his host were about to visit a grave?

The entire reason she was there was because of those secret looks her parents had exchanged with Mr Darcy. The men were now riding out, and it seemed clear that they were riding to a spot amongst the fields and hedgerows of the estate. Lizzy was mystified about her parents having knowledge of or any reason to exchange glances over a grave located on Netherfield land.

I cannot imagine what this is about….

* * *

Following others on horseback without being detected was still difficult and exhausting, despite her practice, but when the men stopped and dismounted, Lizzy congratulated herself on having succeeded. She tied Lady off amongst some trees and then crept closer to the men so she could see and hear what was going on.

Mr Saunders stood fairly far from what looked like a very small stone cross erected in a sunny glade. It must be a grave, truly. Mr Darcy approached the cross, laid the flowers at its wider base, and began speaking, “Father….”

In the context of a cross, Lizzy had assumed the word “Father” meant “God,” but she soon realised that Mr Darcy was speaking to his own father, who had died months before. He said, “Father, I miss you so much. I hope you are looking down on me with some satisfaction. I am trying to do exactly as you requested, and I am attempting to do it with gladness of heart rather than merely requirement or duty.”

He stood silently long enough to cause Lizzy to twitch where she knelt behind a balustrade that separated the glade from a pathway. Then Mr Darcy spoke again. “Father, standing here, I am shaken by the loss the Bennets had to endure. I am very grateful that you told me of it, that you insisted I do something. I hope you will watch over the Bennets while I care for Georgiana and Pemberley. I hope you will soothe the pain Mr and Mrs Bennet must still feel, and I hope that you will help watch over each of the daughters. Especially Miss Elizabeth, who is so clever and courageous that I fear for her.”

Lizzy froze behind the waist-high wall, unwilling even to breathe or move her eyes. Mr Darcy saying her name like that—did it mean that he had seen her, after all, and he was warning her to stay home, as a young lady ought?

She watched as he heaved a sigh, removed a handkerchief from a pocket and dabbed at his eyes. He said, “I hope that I will be able to accomplish something worthwhile at my meeting in London, and I pray that I will prove useful to the Bennets in all the ways I have planned. Please guide my efforts if I stumble. I love you and miss you, and I pray that my efforts in regard to the Bennet family will satisfy your anxiety for our family’s honour.”

Mr Darcy bowed his head silently for a long interval of time, which might have been an entire minute.

When he finally lifted his head and turned back to Mr Saunders, Mr Darcy did not even glance her way. Lizzy was fairly certain that he had not, after all, seen or heard her. He must truly have concerns for her. As she continued to crouch in silence, her thighs beginning to burn as she waited for the men to mount their horses and be on their way back to the manor house, she thought with some irony that the fact that she had surreptitiously shadowed him while disguised as a boy was, in fact, legitimate cause for worry.