Page 99 of The Changeling

I had to find a way to defeat the faery queen.

Adding kindling to the fire, I lit a candle, opened Nan’s old cunning book, and read through it carefully. I was looking for any clues about the Shee. The book was full of charms of protection against them, but nothing about who, or rather, what, they were.

I read the whole book through, then went back and read some of the pages again, committing spells and incantations to memory. Then I tucked Mam’s quilt closer about Sorcha, and got myself dressed and ready. I put wards of protection on the window and doors, poured salt along the threshold, and then, clutching the cunning bag, I went out of the castle and into the woods.

It was twilight, the hour of my birth.

Carlin ran beside me, her nose to the ground. The Knock rose to the north-west, black against the sky. Somewhere there on its eastern flank was a narrow slit of a cave. Sorcha and I had hidden there for weeks, and not once had we seen any sign of anything uncanny. But I had not forgotten my dream and the old woman who had told me that the faery folk could only cross into the mortal world on thin times, at thin places. All Hallows’ Eve was a thin time, the halfway point between the autumn equinox and the winter solstice.

If the cave was a thin place, as I suspected, perhaps the faery queen planned to traverse the worlds tonight. If so, I would be waiting for her. I had my knife and my stout hazel stick. I would force her to release her spells and let my loved ones be. I’d use her secret name against her and bind her to my will, as she had bound me. This time I would go of my own volition.

The closer I came to the Knock, the more afraid I became. It was black as pitch now, and my hands shook so much I could scarcely strike a spark to light my lantern. Overhead the sky was bright with stars. I had run away from home, seven years earlier, on just such a frosty, starry night. I had walked this road then, and conjured mist to conceal myself. Now it was as if I was reversing the years, reversing that journey, going back to the place and time where the faery queen had told me she was my true mother and so cracked my life apart.

I left the road and climbed the path that wound up through bracken and brambles, and then into the shadow beneath old oak trees. My lantern was a golden star in my hand, only showing me a few steps ahead, making the night seem black and silent. I was tiring now. An hour or more had passed, and the way was steep. I paused, breathing hard, my hand to my side, then went on, Carlin at my heels.

My feet remembered the way.

At last, I came to the dark slit of the cave mouth, half-hidden behind hazel trees. I raised high my lantern. No skulls grinned at me. Carlin growled, the hair along her spine rising. ‘It’s all right, lassie,’ I said, patting her head. ‘It’s all right.’

She did not seem to believe me.

I was shaking with terror. The faery queen had been winding in her spool for years, inexorably drawing me here. And now, stupidly, I had come of my own free will, because I loved a man who had forsaken me.

I should go and never come back.

My pulse thudding in my throat, I went into the cave. Dark reaches of bitterly cold air. The floor was rough and uneven. I stumbled, and almost fell. My lantern jerked, and the flame shuddered and turned blue. I caught my breath, and tried to steady my hand. The eerie light flickered and danced over the walls.

The cave was empty.

Nothing was there.

II

Open, Open, Green Hill

It took me a long time to walk back to Inchbrakie Castle. I was chilled through and shivering as I climbed the steps to Robbie’s room. Kneeling by the hearth, I fed the fire till it blazed up bright and strong again, and warmed myself some of the soup I had left in the pot.

Robbie lay so pale and still, my heart lurched. I stroked his hair back from his forehead. ‘I’m sorry she’s done this to you,’ I whispered. ‘And I’m sorry I lied to you so long. It was wrong of me. I swear I’ll make amends somehow.’

I bent and kissed him, hoping the touch of my lips would awaken him. He did not respond.

I sat in the chair by the fire and took out Nan’s cunning book. I closed my eyes and let the book fall open in my hands. Then I looked down at the page that had revealed itself to me.

It was marked with a dried hazel sprig, and showed a botanical drawing of a heart-shaped green leaf with a double serrated edge, tiny red flowers, dangling catkins, and small green nuts ripening to brown. Next to it, Nan had written a list of the healing and magical properties of the hazel tree.

Oil of the nuts for skin ailments, infusions of the leaves to purify blood. A forked hazel twig to search for water or things that had been lost. If you made a wish while wearing a crown of hazel, it would come true. A pocket full of hazelnuts made you invisible. The heroes of old tales carried shields of hazelwood that made them invincible in battle, and a staff of hazelwood would protect you from evil.

I looked down at my own stick. Nan had given it to me when I was just a girl.

My vision swam. I could not stop yawning. Carlin snored peacefully at my feet. It was true I was weary, but this heavy drowsiness felt unnatural to me. I took the little bell out of the cunning bag, and tied one end of its red cord to Robbie’s wrist and the other end to mine.

‘We are handfasted again,’ I told him, ‘at least for tonight.’

I was woken sometime later by the tinkling of the bell. I sat up, rubbing my eyes. Robbie stood by the side of his bed, pulling on his breeches.

‘Robbie!’ I cried and jumped up.

He did not seem to hear or see me. He tried to put on his coat, but the red thread tied about his wrist hindered him. He tugged at it, frowning. I loosened the knot so he was free. He pulled on his boots, crammed a cap over his curls, then went out the door. I hurried after him, Carlin following silently.