Page 62 of The Flight Risk

“Lottie, sometimes the hero needs to step back and give the heroine some space to figure things out. Sometimes hope is all the hero has left. I’m just respecting what Tess wants. Like I always have.”

“I refuse to accept that and you’re an idiot if hope is all you have left. You know deep down that my Aunt Tess doesn’t want this. She’s stubborn and she’s afraid and she needs someone like you. Someone who believes that the hero is the one who gets the girl in the end because… all she’s ever had in her life were villains.” She approaches me and pokes a finger against my chest, with such a serious look on her face. “So get her back. Sweep her off her feet because she loves you, Adam, and you love her.”

It’s amazing how quickly society writes off teenagers. As if they can’t feel what’s happening around them. As if they can’t observe the dynamics adults set up for them to expect in life.

Lottie pokes my chest again. “It is that simple. Why did you let her leave?”

All that comes to mind is Tess’ snowglobe collection, and it’s honestly the best way I can describe the reason I let her walk out my door. “Because I’m afraid if I push too hard against the fragile glass, it’s going to shatter for good. Tess isn’t the only one who’s scared to ruin things forever, Charlotte.”

She slowly nods, understanding the importance and weight of my words because she’s just like Tess in so many ways. The fear of letting love in being one of the ways.

“I’m just giving her time,” I murmur. “That sure as hell doesn’t mean I’m letting go of her.”

35

As I click on the “continue watching” button on Netflix, I feel judged by a damn streaming service. Here I am sitting on my couch, rewatching Emily in Paris over and over like it’s medicine for my aching heart. I haven’t ever cried as much as I have these past few days since I moved back into my lonely, cold apartment. It doesn’t feel like home anymore.

The door unlocks and Pippa jumps to attention, rushing to the door to greet Lottie.

“Hey!” I try to make my voice cheerful. “How was practice?”

Lottie slowly walks towards me. Instead of the usual debrief of the day, she remains silent.

“Lottie? Is everything okay?” I prop myself up on my elbow, awaiting her response. All I’m greeted with is a scoff. Her backpack hits the floor with a thud loud enough to disturb my downstairs neighbors for sure. “Hold on, what’s with the attitude?”

She bends down to pet Pippa and talks to her instead of me. “Hmmm, I don’t know, maybe it’s because you moved us back here without even talking to me first. Let’s start with that.”

I knew this was coming. I knew that moving her stuff out without telling her was wrong, but I needed to get out of there before I changed my mind. I take a deep breath and brace myself for wherever this conversation goes. I reiterate what I already told her. “My apartment was finally ready, Lottie. We couldn’t just keep on living with Oakley forever. He was so generous for letting us stay with him in the first place. It wouldn’t be fair for us to continue upending his life.”

Her eyes pierce into mine like a lance. “No, what’s not fair is that you destroyed something great. Oakley is my friend. He’s the first guy I have ever been able to trust. Ever. He’s a genuinely great guy and I just don’t understand what the hell happened.”

I cover my face and images of Oakley flash through my mind like a montage of our relationship. The first time I saw him smile on the couch in Telluride. The first time he touched me. The first time he kissed me. It’s a highlight reel on repeat.

The thing about my relationship with Lottie is that I’m always real with her. I never sugar-coat anything. I tell her the truth.

“I got scared. Scared that he was getting too close.” Saying the truth out loud is excruciating.

“What is the problem with that? Newsflash, Aunt Tess, that’s what people do when they love each other. They get close.”

My mouth is getting dry. I swipe my empty tumbler from my coffee table and walk over to the kitchen. I did not have being interrogated about my love life, albeit failed love life, by a high schooler on my bingo card for this year. Yet, here I am. I press my large green water bottle against the water dispenser in the fridge and before it’s full, I hear, “You need to talk to Oakley.”

“No.” I twist the top of my water bottle on and I keep twisting until my palm turns red and I know I’ll regret it later when I try to refill it and can’t get the damn thing off.

“You do realize that he was going to ask you to move in with him, right?” My heart drops so intensely I feel like I’m twelve years old, back on a roller coaster I hate. This makes me feel so much worse. That is definitely information I did not need to know. “He told me.”

“Wait, when did he tell you this?” I snap.

“Literally thirty minutes ago. I went over to his house thinking that all of this was his fault. That he did something wrong. But I found out that you are the reason we aren’t living with him anymore and the reason you aren’t together.”

“You went over to his house? Lottie, you have to tell me if plans change in your schedule. I thought you were at practice and I didn’t ask for your location because I trust you. You need to communicate with me.”

“Like you communicated with me when you packed up all of my belongings and upended my life… again?”

Damn, she has me there. Guilt washes over me. Pippa whimpers from all the tension. I pick her up and hold her under my arm. “Regardless, it doesn’t matter that he wanted to ask me to move in. It would have changed nothing.”

“That’s a load of crap and you know it.”

“Lottie!”