Page 100 of Nightshade

“I am always in favor of discipline.” An unbidden image of lying naked across his lap flashed through my head, and as if he could see the same visual, his lips curved into a smile.

Cheeks hot, I lowered my gaze and nodded. “Then, I’ll respect your wishes,” I said, and slipped through the door.

32

Lustina

Lustina lay in bed, staring at the wall from where the Messiah, nailed to the crucifix, stared back at her. Her thoughts drifted to earlier in the night and the argument she’d had with the baron. How cruel his words had been. So cruel, they burned inside her chest with a bitterness that kept her awake when she should’ve been fast asleep. Part of her knew he’d spoken out of pain and anger, and that she should just dismiss it and go to sleep, but a greater part hated him for his cruelty.

Could she have known his heart any better than in that moment? Did they not suffer a kindred pain? Yet, he’d treated her as if she were a stranger. His enemy.

And every time she thought of his face, as he’d spat his spiteful words, a heavy and hollow ache throbbed against her ribs.

A sound interrupted her thoughts, and Lustina twisted where she lay, catching sight of a shadowed figure climbing in through her window.

She jolted upright, kicking back against the wall behind her, as the young baron stepped into the moon’s light. The sight of him sent both a thrill and panic pulsing through her.

“My Lord, what are you doing?”

He pressed a finger to his lips and reached out for her. “Come with me.”

Much as she wanted to refuse him, after what’d happened in the cathedral earlier, she didn’t. She couldn’t—she was all too aware what evil thoughts had plagued her own mind after her mother’s death. Instead, she climbed out of bed, clad in only her simple, white nightgown, and met him at the window. Once there, he tugged her to his lips for a kiss that held a million apologies.

Every fiber of her being beckoned her to push him away, to make him grovel and beg for her forgiveness, but that was the thing about kindred pain. It forced one to give rather than deny.

“Forgive me for earlier,” he said against her lips. “You are the only person left in this world for me. I fed you my wrath, and still, you offered nothing but grace. You, of all people, did not deserve that.”

“I did not mean to incite--”

He pressed a finger to her lips, silencing her. “You incited nothing more than my own remorse for having treated you so cruel. I was angry. Irrational. Mad with grief. But that was no excuse to speak to you that way.” He traced a soft caress along her temple to her cheek. “My heart has always been a restless scavenger, Lustina. But in you, I have found repletion. I do not wish to lose that. Or you.”

“All is forgiven.”

He pressed another kiss to her lips and urged her toward the sill. “Come with me into the night.”

“My Lord, someone will see us.” She tugged at his arm, urging him away, but he gripped her hand tighter.

“Then, we will hurry.” Having slipped through the window, he climbed down the tall trellis and paused only a short distance down. “Come. If you fall, I will catch you.”

The sight of the ground stories below left her feeling dizzy and ill. “I do not think I can.”

“Close your eyes. I am right here.”

Sucking in a deep breath, she nervously climbed through the window and stepped down onto the trellis, clutching to the windowsill as she clamped her eyes shut. “I … I do not think I can do this.” The harsh wood dug into her tender feet, only adding to the panic of her downward climb.

“Step down, Lustina. Move toward my voice.”

Body trembling, she shook her head frantically and clung to the viny structure for dear life. “No, I cannot. I cannot do it.”

“You can. It is fear which tells you otherwise.”

Fingers curled into the trellis, she might have chuckled at that, if not for her stiff and quivering jaw. “Fear has good reason to protest. Such a fall would prove deadly.”

“One step down, or I will carry you down.”

One step. Only one step.

She mentally willed her leg to move. Her foot slipped, and the trellis sliced at her fingers as she dangled from it before gaining her footing again.