Page 49 of The Dating Charade

“You sure?” Sunny said.

Yes. Simply, the answer was yes. If he was stuck between a rock and a hard place and had to take up Sarah’s offers for babysitting, he at least could try to avoid her on Sundays, when he was off. Also, there was another, equally significant, reason for going his own way. “Cross Point doesn’t have a double service. I’m going somewhere they have two services.”

“Why’s that?”

“So for two and a half hours I can breathe.”

“Let me get this straight.” Sunny slid on his only pair of nice shoes—one in fact disfigured by Drew’s chew marks. “The service is going to end, people are going to leave, and you are just going to keep sitting in some pew, going through the whole thing again.”

“That’s right.” Jett adjusted his tie, then picked Dakota up. “And I’m going to relish every moment of it.”

Sunny laughed and opened the door. “Whatever floats your boat, man.”

Sarah’s own door opened.

“Ready, boys?” Sarah turned the key in her deadbolt and faced them. Jett had never seen Sarah wearing earrings so large before, and the thick eyeliner above her lids made the almond shape of her green eyes seem almost catlike. Catlike . . . in a pretty way. She tied a decorative belt around her pea coat.

Jett picked up the car seat and grabbed Drew’s roaming hand. “Not for us today. We’re going to try another church down the street.”

Sarah glanced to Sunny, the gears clearly turning behind those catlike eyes of hers. “Oh? We could . . . go along with you if you wanted. I’m sure you could use the help.”

He felt the tug from Drew toward the stairs, and gladly obliged. “No, you guys go on. I had to get out of the house with them eventually. Might as well be today.”

Sarah seemed hesitant, uncertain as she watched him take the car seat from Sunny. “If you’re sure . . . Will you still meet us for lunch?”

It was painful hearing how hard she was trying to sound nonchalant. He didn’t want to hurt her feelings, which only pushed him more to know what he had to do: refuse the babysitting offers as much as possible, show an obvious nonchalance toward her, emphasize as much as possible that their relationship was utterly, wholly platonic. In essence, dig himself out of this grave of kindness. “We’ll probably lay low after service—or rather, services. You guys have fun.”

She fiddled with her keys. “Oh. Alright. Well, we’re just a call away if you end up needing us. Right, Sunny?”

“Oh, sure. Definitely. I’ll definitely not have my phone turned off the second you walk downstairs.”

“Thanks, Sunny. You’re a true friend.” Jett let himself be pulled down the stairs by Drew, which didn’t feel too far off from getting yanked by a Doberman. “I’ll be sure to keep the kids away from your DVD collection while you’re gone.”

* * *

Cross Point, the old grocery building turned church he’d attended the past few months, was nothing like First Community. The church itself looked like an ancient European monastery with a mall parking lot, all plotted on no less than seventy-five acres. Just to get into the parking lot there were three volunteers in orange jackets directing him. Still, he got lost twice.

“Stick on that roof!” Drew proclaimed, pointing out the window. “There’s a stick on that roof, Uncle Jett!”

Jett squinted. “That’s what we call a steeple, buddy.”

Three car seats to unbuckle, one pair of shoes kicked off to replace, and several hands to hold, and Jett finally made it into the stream of churchgoers in the main lobby. He searched around for a sign. Women in skirts carefully climbed the stairs to a second level. A group of men gathered in the center of the ornately red carpet, chatting. Three couples were standing next to various doors leading to what he could assume was the church sanctuary. They passed out sermon notes while someone inside struck the piano keys.

Finally, a break in the crowd led to a sign, where the word Nursery was followed by an arrow.

He pulled the kids left. Hey, this wasn’t so bad.

Dakota was in one arm. TJ was drooling, fast asleep in his car seat in the other arm. Drew, for once, was calmly walking beside him down the deep and long hallway. The large, wallpaper-type pictures of people from around the world caused Drew to slow to a stop several times as he became fascinated by the face of an elderly Indian man or a Filipino child. For a minute Jett waited, letting Drew look at the photograph of two women washing their clothes along the Nile.

He took a breath, eyes skimming over the card beside the photo describing the church’s work in that area. Despite the commencement tune on the piano down the hall, despite the rush of latecomers kicking up their heels and oxfords as they rushed by them into the sanctuary, the kids were quiet, and everything felt calm. Maybe he wasn’t so bad at this parenting thing after all. The kids were here, weren’t they? They were happy; they were clothed.

In this moment he felt a sort of sweetness as he held his niece close and watched Drew’s wide eyes take in something new. The kid was always learning. Every day they were learning. And for the thousandth time he felt a pang, trying to imagine where Trina was, how she was faring, knowing she was missing this.

He set TJ’s car seat down and leaned back against the wall, letting Drew take his moment to observe. Maybe, just maybe, this wasn’t going to be impossible. If he just got himself together, got a sitter when he was working, made a schedule, read some parenting books. He might have to find a bigger place, but the dream of settling into his own home had already started churning a few months ago. Gatlinburg had plenty of good houses out in the country, where you could open your blinds to something else besides a parking lot. Where you could drop a dumbbell on your floor without getting a complaint from downstairs tenants. He’d always liked the idea of having cows. Plenty a meal at work had come from the beef raised on the farm of one of the guys. He could call up his old buddy from high school he’d run into the other day, a realtor—

“Are you looking for the nursery?” A middle-aged woman paused in her passing, her arm tucked around a stack of hymnals.

He straightened up. “Yes, actually. This is our first time here.”