Page 62 of First Kiss with a Mothman

He laughs softly against my skin. “No. It’s not that.”

“Then…”

He sighs and sits up, leaning on the wall, and I do the same. “It was…something I did before I even got to Hollywood.”

“Wha…what?”

“Arie, I spent years in an orphanage.”

“I know.”

“I never told anyone this, but…I wasn’t alone.”

“What?”

His voice grows solemn. “Allegedly my parents got divorced right after I was born. But my dad remarried and had another kid when I was still a baby.”

My eyebrows rise, and I hold his hand tighter. He has a half-sibling?

“I don’t remember the divorce details, but I always recognized him as my brother, never just a half of anything. His mom died during all the chaos of the Halloween Wave, too, so we were both at the orphanage together. My grandmother tried to remain close with us, but there was so much going on at the reservation, and all this red tape with us being taken with child protective services.”

“Mort,” I say softly. I think I know where this is going, and my heart is already breaking for him.

“My brother and I stuck together. We were two bug shifters, ready to face this new world that had to adjust to monsters.” He sniffs and says, “But life in the orphanage was awful. There was barely any food to go around, it was hardly cleaned, and that’s nothing of the bullying we faced for being monsters. I would have done anything to get us out. I didn’t know recording videos of myself singing and dancing would go viral. I was just doing it for fun, and someone in the library taught me how to upload videos. My brother and I were so thrilled when my video got millions of views.”

He tenses up even more, so I squeeze his hand again. “I got flown out to The Deborah Show, that huge talk show. I was accompanied by the man who would be my first agent. After that episode, there were all sorts of promises about pitching a show for me, even a possible record deal. All of this magical escapism for a poor little kid like me. The biggest thing they promised was I’d never have to go back to that orphanage to be cold, dirty, and hungry again. They all promised I’d have money. I just wouldn’t have time to take care of anyone back home. So I…I stopped talking to everyone at the orphanage and the reservation. I threw away my past, all to focus on my future. It was…was the price to pay for my way out.”

Oh no. I lean Mort forward, and he shivers as his traumatic memories pour out of him. “Arie. I abandoned my brother,” he says through a sob.

“Hey, hey, shhh.” I rub his back, trying to calm him, but I know there’s nothing I can do. His memories, his triumphs, and his mistakes are all his own. I just wish I could take his pain away.

“I…I abandoned them all. My family. My little brother.” He sobs against my chest. His tears burn my skin, and in moments, I’m crying too.

“Mort, baby, it’s okay.”

“How could anyone want to be with someone like me? I don’t deserve…deserve happiness.”

“Yes, you do.”

He sniffs and raises his head up. “B-but, I abandoned…”

I card my hands through his hair and face him. “Baby, listen to me. Everyone makes mistakes. You were just a kid put in an impossible situation. The adults in your life and the system failed you. Someone should have looked out for both of you, but not every problem is on you. You did what you could, Mort.”

He begins to shake his head, but I hold him still. “Mort, you deserve happiness. And I want to be that happiness for you. You have friends who care about you, and you’ve made so many of my dreams come true. I’m honored to be your boyfriend, because you are still worthy. Do you still want to be with me?”

He sniffs and nods. “Yes.”

“Then be with me. Keep making me happy. Keep making my dreams come true.”

“Alright.” He nods, and I kiss him slowly.

“Remember, you are not defined by your mistakes. Do you understand me, Mort Rain?”

“Okay.” His voice is filled with reluctance, but I say nothing as he lies on my lap. I continue to stroke his head as he calms down. When his breathing evens out, I readjust us both so we’re lying down again. It doesn’t take long for Mort to start softly snoring.

After having spectacular sex for the first time, Mort has given me yet another gift. I may have lost my virginity to him, but he’s shared with me the most intimate part of him, his greatest sin. I have ideas on how to possibly make it right, but we can discuss it later. I’m not sure where he wants to go from here, but whatever he chooses, I hope Mort Rain continues to want me by his side. Because I don’t know how long I can refrain from admitting that I am falling in love with this mothman.

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