Page 28 of One Merciful Moment

The squash blooms held the night's dew. Ashley knelt beside the plants, checking for bugs, disease, and root rot. Everstill's controlled climate kept everything in perfect condition. From a gardener's viewpoint, it was amazing how well things grew.

She glanced at Boone, several feet away. He stood with his arms crossed, gaze fixed on the line of trees.

After last night, he'd locked down again. He'd sealed himself behind the wall she thought she'd helped dismantle. But he'd rebuilt it the moment she asked him to come home with her once the veil opened.

He'd gone into a mood she didn't understand. Even though they slept in the same bed, he felt miles away. Not touching her. Not talking.

"Boone," she said finally, brushing dirt from her fingers, "are you going to talk to me?"

"Nothing to talk about."

She exhaled and stood. "You're upset."

"I'm fine." His jaw tightened.

"You're not." She stepped closer, not wanting to broadcast their troubles to everyone else in the garden. "You barely slept. You wouldn't look at me this morning. You walked out before I even finished getting dressed."

Arguing wasn't something she was good at. Raised by her grandma on the edge of town, most of her time had been spent alone after graduating from school. Always a loner, she loved the outdoors and her plants more than most people.

Until Boone.

Now his silence aggravated her. If his feelings weren't as strong as hers, then why was he sleeping beside her every night? Why was he following her around, trying to protect her?

"Just drop it, Ash." His shoulders broadened.

"No." She moved in front of him, forcing him to see her. "You don't get to shut down and pretend nothing's wrong. Not after everything we've been through together."

His gaze flickered.

She placed her hand on his arm. "Is this about what I said? About coming home with me?"

His nose twitched.

She had her answer.

She sighed. "I didn't mean it like I was choosing one place over the other. I just—"

"It's impossible," he said.

Ashley blinked. "What is?"

"Me. Out there." He gestured vaguely toward the horizon, toward the world beyond the veil. "I won't survive it."

"Of course you'll—"

"I'm a fucking addict." His voice cracked. "You take me out of Everstill, you take away the quiet. I'll go right back to using and selling and owing my life to someone else."

She cupped the base of her neck, reeling as if he'd slapped her. "You don't know that."

"I know myself. I know what I am." Boone stepped back, out of reach. "I spent years trying to kill myself with drugs. Years. Then I found myself in Everstill, and for the first time, living didn't hurt. Numbness is everything I sought my whole life, and here, I had it."

She gasped softly. "Until I showed up?"

"You think one garden and a few deer fixed me?" His gaze narrowed. "Do you think you cured me?"

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to." He scratched at his arms. "You think I can walk out of here and be normal. Be stable. Be... whatever you think I am in your head."