Page 51 of Back To Our Beginning

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Not just good, it’s almost like you’re… I don’t know. Settled?”

The waitress dropped off my coffee. I took a long sip before speaking. “Do you miss it? The teams, I mean.”

Kai didn’t answer for a moment. “I knew what you meant.” He looked off in the distance for a while, before looking back at me. “I miss Clay. You’d like him. I miss the action. The adrenaline.”

“What about the brotherhood? The purpose. The fact that you always knew somebody had your back?” I asked.

“I have those things with Onyx.”

“Really?”

“Maybe not totally, but that’s just because we haven’t worked together that long. But Roan and Simon? They are worthy men. I would go into battle with them in a heartbeat.”

“Well, I should hope so. After all, Roan was a Marine Raider.” I grinned.

“I had my doubts about Simon being a SEAL and Roan being a Raider, but despite their bad decisions, they’ve proved themselves.”

I laughed.

“Seriously, Kai, how does it feel? Living here, I mean. Doing what you’re doing now?”

“I’d been away from my team for a year working on my recovery. I think that makes a difference. Because of that, it was easier for me to transition.”

“What about moving from North Carolina to Jasper Creek? Was that tough?”

“Nope, Marlowe’s here. That changed everything. She’s my home now. Jasper Creek? It’s where my feet landed because she’s here.”

I nodded slowly. “I get that. I liked what I heard about Onyx the other night. It sounded like actual work.”

“That was just one case. Trust me, there are others that are like our missions. Action-packed, purpose-driven, only without the red tape and orders from men who’ve never worn a uniform.”

Kai paused and looked me in the eye.

“So, are you thinking about it?”

I sighed and took another sip of my now lukewarm coffee.

“I would be, under different circumstances. I want to get my twenty years. I want the retirement benefits. What’s more, I can’t leave my team now. We’ve been through hell together. We all promised one another we would do our twenty together. You know how it is.”

Kai nodded. “I do. But sometimes you have to give up that sense of obligation when there is something more important.”

Now it was my turn to look off into the distance. “I’m in love with her. I mean, down to my bones, in love with her. I can’t stop myself from thinking what it would feel like to build a life with her.”

“Then do it.”

“I don’t know how to walk away.”

“You don’t have to. Not yet. But think about what it would be like if you walked toward her. Toward a life with her.”

I leaned back in the booth, this time staring up at the crooked ceiling fan above us. I leaned back to look at my brother. My twin. “You think I’d like working for Onyx?”

Kai gave me a knowing grin. “Yeah, you’ll like it. We don’t do boring. We do good work. We protect the people who matter. It’s not so different from what we did before, just a different battlefield.”

“Yeah,” I muttered, but my thoughts were already back with Maddie. With her smile. Her strength. Her kindness. Her bossiness.

“You okay?”