Page 52 of Commander’s Mate

Not peaceful. Peace belonged to familiar beds, kitchens, coffee, and weather you could complain about because it was yours.

This was the silence after something broke.

Scarlet sat on one side of me, Nora on the other, Zoe across the table. For a while none of us spoke.

Then Zoe wiped her eyes. “I keep wondering who found my mailbox open.”

My throat tightened.

“My garbage bag,” I said.

Scarlet looked at me.

“I was taking out the garbage. There was still recycling on the porch. If anybody came by, they’d think I forgot.”

“Someone will know,” Nora said softly.

“Know what?” Scarlet asked, anger sharpening her voice. “That aliens took us? They’ll think human men kidnapped us. Or that we ran away. Or that we’re dead. Whatever makes sense on Earth.”

Zoe’s face crumpled. “My mom calls every Sunday.”

I reached across and took her hand.

Home came at me in pieces: my chipped blue bowl, the plant I kept forgetting to water, the uneven step by the back door, my bed, the pile of mail on the counter I had meant to sort.

I was never going to sort it.

That ridiculous thought nearly undid me again.

“I need a minute.”

Scarlet half rose. “Don’t go wandering.”

“I’m not. Just there.” I pointed toward the viewport.

Outside, faster-than-light travel turned the stars into smeared color. Beautiful and hateful at the same time.

I stood there until my breathing steadied.

I wanted Zared.

That truth sat beside the grief instead of replacing it.

My body remembered his mouth. My mind remembered the way he had stopped when Scarlet warned him, the way he had told us the truth even when it made him look selfish, the way he had said my work on Earth mattered because ordinary things made worlds.

If he had been cruel, I could have hated him cleanly.

Instead I trusted him a little.

That was much more frightening.

A soft step sounded behind me.

Kyanna came to stand beside me.

“I am sorry,” she said.

“For what?”