Page 62 of Carnal Risk

“Apparently he’d made it outside his house. By the time he arrived, he’d lost too much blood.”

“What about surgery?”

“I’m afraid he was DOA. We tried to resuscitate, but there was nothing we could do for him.”

“Jesus Christ,” Garrett breathed. Tears brimmed from his lashes and he swiped at them with the back of his hand. “I’ve got to see Beckett.”

“Go,” Selby told him.

Garrett opened the door to the room. Lars took her hand in his and they followed. Beckett sat at the bedside with his head laid on his brother’s arm. A nurse brushed past Selby, and shut off the machines. She gave Beckett a sympathetic nod as she covered the bloodstained sheets with fresh linens before exiting the room, leaving them alone.

Selby bit her lip, watching Garrett take Beckett into his arms. The young man wept into his shoulder, and Selby looked to Lars, who’d also begun to cry. Nothing could make it better, she knew. There were no words in death’s final moments that relieved the emptiness that filled your heart when a loved one passed away. The horrific manner of his death only compounded their devastation. Selby wrapped her arms around Lars, offering him her silent condolences.

As Garrett’s friends from Altura filtered into the room, Blaire’s cold stare reminded her that in this private moment, she was indeed an outsider. As she released Lars, she quietly mourned the loss of a man she’d only met once. Their interaction had been brief but pleasant as she recalled the twins’ friendly banter. Although she backed into the shadows, she could overhear Garrett questioning Beckett.

“Did you find him?”

“Yeah, we were supposed to go to dinner. When I arrived all the lights were off. He was just there on the deck…the blood, there was so much blood. Why would someone do this?” he cried.

“I don’t know.” Garrett’s eyes met hers, and Selby knew he was lying. Both Cormac and Beckett had worked for Evan.

“Did you see anyone in the house?”

“No, I didn’t go in. I just stayed with him until the ambulance came. They couldn’t save him. He told me he loved me and I…” Beckett sobbed and fell into the chair, putting his face into his hands. “I can’t believe he’s gone. This is so fucked up.”

The door cracked open and Dean entered.

“Cormac…he was murdered,” Garrett said.

“Yeah, I heard from my guys. Beckett, I’m so sorry.” Selby noted the caring tone of Dean’s voice. While he’d argued with Garrett that day in the office, he was their friend.

“We need to talk.” Garrett nodded to Dean. “Be right back.”

As they left the room, Selby followed. She found a bench to rest on while Garrett and Dean discussed what had happened to Cormac. Lars came up beside her and sat down, letting his head fall back against the wall.

“I’m sorry, Lars. He seemed like such a nice guy.”

“He just got his doctorate. He loved Evan. I’m telling you, Selby,” he whispered, “This is all related to Evan’s death. Please tell me you’ll stay at Garrett’s.”

“I told you I would,” she assured him.

“If anything happened to you, I’d never forgive myself. You didn’t ask for this assignment. I got you into this mess. If I had known for one second that this would be happening, there’s no way I’d have got you involved.”

“There’s no way you could have known. You even said you thought that Evan’s death was an accident. But Lars,” Selby wrung her hands, gathering the courage to tell him about Evan. “I have something I need to tell you and Garrett.”

“What?”

“I don’t want to say it here, but there is something else. Something about Evan I need to tell you. And Garrett isn’t going to want to hear it. We fought today about his involvement in whatever’s happening. He thinks Evan was completely innocent, but I’m telling you, I don’t think he was. The fact that I could get into Emerson. They’re a government contractor. You know I’m good but still, that’s some serious shit. Whatever Evan did to that laptop…he’s got something on it. Something that shouldn’t be there.”

Dean and Garrett approached, and Selby went quiet. She swore she would tell Garrett everything as soon as they got home. A second man was dead and she suspected that until the attackers got what they wanted, it would continue. Garrett gave her a suspicious look as if he’d heard her talking to Lars and she avoided eye contact. She knew that he didn’t want Dean knowing about the laptop, but sooner or later they’d have to tell him. The web of lies had grown exponentially, and something had to give. She steeled her heart, aware that once she told Garrett the truth, he might never talk to her again.

Selby stood nude in front of the mirror, wiping the moisture from her body. Garrett had insisted that she and Lars return to his mansion while he helped Beckett make arrangements. During the long limo ride home, Selby and Lars had sat in silence. When they’d arrived, they were met by armed guards who’d taken a visible presence at the front door. Exhausted, she’d checked her programs, but didn’t have the energy to dig any further into Emerson’s files. She’d already made the decision to first tell Garrett about how she’d met Evan, and let the chips fall where they may.

She’d hurried to take a shower, washing away the putrid smell of the hospital. As she dried her body, she caught a glimpse of her scar in the mirror and thought about how she hadn’t revealed the insidious cause of it to Garrett. Doing so would leave her completely vulnerable, she knew. Yet there was a small part of her that yearned to tell him, aware of the intimacy that would come with sharing her secret.

Selby brushed her hair, and considered that it was worth the risk. She suspected that Garrett wouldn’t judge her. He’d been compassionate and forthright every step of the way, and he deserved to know everything about her. For once in her life, she wanted to let someone inside her heart.

A noise from the bedroom drew her attention. Garrett. No longer would she hide from herself or him. She’d tell him the truth and fight with everything she had to keep him in her life.