Page 39 of How to Woo a Highlander

"What?" he asked dully. William opened his eyes and gave his friend a sad smile.

"Aye, I have been in love with a woman for many years. I never told ye. I have been hurtin’ in silence, so I can understand how Jane would feel if she were forced to marry me. Nayone could ever replace me woman in me broken heart, so I understand," he added.

William says he is heartbroken? What happened between him and the mystery woman?

Alastair was still standing in shock as William got to his feet and patted his shoulder on the way out.

"I will be going to sleep now. I havenae rested since I left the clan. I entrust the preparations to ye," he said not wanting to speak more on the subject, and with that, he left the study, with Alastair trying to process his words.

* * *

Alastair had just finished making preparations for the coming allies and heading back into the castle when he turned the corner and met John Baxendale, very obviously waiting for him. His eyes lit up at the sight of Alastair walking towards him.

He could not help but feel awkward having the English captain staring at him from where he was leaning against the wall. The man had the air of a real soldier about him. His gaze was evidence of his seasoned life, and his eyes flashed coldly at Alastair, sizing him up.

"Good day to ye, Mr. Baxendale," he greeted hesitantly, "I dinnae believe we have been formally introduced."

He was planning to step forward and offer his hand in greeting when John Baxendale leaned away from the wall and moved closer to meet him with his arms folded over his chest.

Despite being a little taller and broader than the older man, Alastair could not help but feel intimidated when meeting his eyes. The only thing that made him able to hold his gaze was the thought of how alike John Baxendale's eyes were to his daughter's.

"So, it is you," John Baxendale growled. Alastair could only angle his head, not sure if he heard correctly.

"I beg yer pardon?" he asked, not understanding. He had no prior involvement with the English captain to his knowledge. The most he had seen of him was a glance in William's office when he listened to his demand that the wedding happen quickly.

The only thing that would connect him to John Baxendale would be Jane. However, it was impossible that he knew what had occurred. A cold drop of sweat trickled down the side of his face as he became increasingly nervous.

"Alastair Bain, is it not?" John began, drawing the interaction out and leaving Alastair to stew. "I hear the Laird fancies you as his best friend. His loyal right-hand man?"

He nodded, certain of his stance.

"Aye, I am," he declared, standing a little straighter. John Baxendale smiled and patted his shoulder.

"That's a good man, and I hear you truly are loyal," he praised. Somehow his tone made Alastair wary.

"It is because of that loyalty that I know you will not be a hindrance in the way of your friend's marriage. Is that not so?"

Alastair quickly understood John Baxendale’s meaning and why he had come to him in the first place. He knew something about his involvement with Jane. He could not answer the question, especially when the man was looking at him so closely.

He wanted to agree immediately, but the truth was that he was not sure that he could stay away from Jane. He wanted to walk away now that he knew of their relationship, but he did not have the strength. Deep down, he still wished for some miracle to happen that would allow Jane to be his.

John Baxendale heaved an annoyed sigh, removing his hand from Alastair's shoulder.

"I can see you hesitate, boy," he added. "What is it? You think you have developed feelings for my daughter?"

Alastair knew the answer but did not want to answer, especially when he could sense a slightly condescending tone from the English man.

He had fallen for Jane Baxendale, despite his best efforts to resist and ignore the feelings. When he closed his eyes, all he could see was her: that luscious auburn hair, her beautiful smile, the sparkling green eyes that captivated him, everything.

Another pair of green eyes were now glaring at him. John Baxendale glanced both ways down the hall, ensuring that no one was listening.

"I do not think you understand how important it is for your clan that Jane should marry your Laird, Mr. Bain," he said, lowering his voice as though reasoning with Alastair.

"You know of the English army, do you not? That powerful force of strong men has conquered many lands, stomping on the enemy with their strength and not stopping until all resistance is thwarted," John began.

Alastair had to clench his jaw as old wounds resurfaced. He knew of the English army all too well. All the resentment he thought buried came bursting out like blood out of an old wound. Listening to John Baxendale's praise for his soldiers was enough to return his bias and make him angry.

Nay, ye shouldnae be angry, Alastair. Remember what Jane has taught ye.