Page 24 of Paradigm

Eline shook her head and said, “I asked her not to reach out. I told her that I would, but by the time I thought I could actually handle talking to her, knowing her again, and finding out if she’d met someone else, I guess I didn’t want to interrupt her life in case she had.”

“And you didn’t want to get your heart broken again,” Marti added and nodded knowingly.

“That too,” Eline said, smiling down at the bar. “Now, she’s here, and I’m here, and when I saw her, I felt like I was right back in that bookstore. She’s still so beautiful, kind, and funny, and she’s always been ridiculously smart. I mean, she basically built the app from scratch.”

“The app?”

“She founded a company with her friends. They’ve got an app. She built it with little to no help, for the most part. I always knew she’d be a great programmer, but…”

“It’s still there, isn’t it?”

Eline nodded and replied, “Yes, I feel it. It’s like it never left, and everything in between – the relationships, the dates – it’s all been a lie because it was always meant to be her.”

“I take it, you didn’t say that to her?”

“No. It was pretty awkward once we started talking, and I understand why, but I couldn’t help but wish that we could have us back.”

“You might not ever be able to. It’s been a long time,” Marti reasoned before she took a drink of her beer.

“I know. I just… I’ve never felt with anyone else what she makes me feel. It’s like she–”

“Was put here just for you?” Marti asked.

“Yes.”

“That’s how I’ve always felt about Marissa – like she was never meant to just be my best friend; she was always meant to be my forever, my one person, and it’s been awful, having to pretend otherwise.”

“Do you think that’s what I’ll have to do if I want Arlowe back in my life?”

“Meaning, you don’t think you can be with her romantically?”

“I don’t know. I think she’s single, but I didn’t confirm that. And it’s likely that there’s some anger there. I could feel it from her. She’s upset with me, and I get why.”

“But you want more?”

“I think so. It’s still there. That has to mean something.”

“When will you see her again? Maybe you two can keep talking and eventually get there,” Marti suggested.

“I don’t know. She said she would call me, and it’s been a couple of days. I want to let her be in charge this time since it was my fault last time, so I haven’t reached out. Should I, though?”

“I’d give her some time. I’m sure seeing you for the first time has her rocked. But what if you two do try again, and it doesn’t work anymore? Have you thought about that? You’re different now. I’m sure she is, too.”

“I haven’t even allowed myself to think that far ahead. I got home after we met at that coffee shop, and I wondered why she wore my old T‑shirt to meet me.”

“She wore your shirt?”

“She stole it back then. I’d forgotten about it, but there she was, looking gorgeous and dressy casual, and my old band shirt was under a blazer. I thought it meant something. I got my hopes up a little, and I just… I don’t know that I can do that again right now.”

“She’ll call, Eline.”

“How do you know?”

“Because she wore your shirt,” Marti said and shrugged a shoulder. “No woman does that after, what, like a hundred years or something? She wouldn’t have done that if it didn’t mean anything to her, and it clearly did.”

“And how do you know that?”

“Because she kept the shirt.”