Page 13 of Rookie Moves

He appraises me with those gorgeous eyes, his expression giving nothing away.

As I’m about to open my mouth to beg him to say something, he nods slowly and says, “Yeah, okay.”

Reaching back to rub the back of my neck, I contemplate where to start with the million and one questions running through my mind.

“Does anyone know?”

“That I’m a virgin or that I’m asking you?”

“Both?”

He shrugs, fixing his gaze on something over my shoulder. “Only Stassie. It was, uh… kind of her idea.”

I cough out a breath. Okay, so I guess that’s who the pink-haired girl is. Did they have this conversation after they left me standing on the sidewalk, watching them walk away like a loser?

“Was it now?” I ask in amusement.

“Yeah.” He ducks his chin, a shy smile playing on his lips. “I, um… I better get ready for practice.”

Colby goes to step around me, but the word “Wait” comes out without me thinking. I glance down to where my hand is still wrapped around his forearm and reluctantly let him go.

“Why me?” I ask, giving voice to the earlier seed of doubt brewing in my head.

He takes a slow breath, and nothing could prepare me for his response when he replies, “I feel safe with you.”

My heart stops for the briefest moment, and a weight of relief floods my stomach.

It had been playing on my mind all night after what he said. Knowing how alone he’s been feeling for who knows how long, hearing him say he feels safe with me… It means everything.

So can I really let someone else take what is a vulnerable moment from him, knowing what I do? Could I be the safe person he needs to learn and explore sex with, knowing I would take every moment with him to the grave?

But we’re teammates.

Fuck, I know. I know it’s not as easy as just saying yes to a friends-with-bennies situation when there’s so much on the line.

Mainly for Colby, because my future is inconsequential compared to his. But it’s still not something we can just jump into without thinking things through.

When he speaks again, I realize I haven’t said anything for several minutes.

“I’m sorry if I’ve made things awkward between us,” he says solemnly.

“You haven’t,” I tell him quickly, not wanting him to worry. “Just give me a couple of days to think about it. But I promise you, Colbs, I’ll protect your trust with my life. Regardless of what my decision is.”

Colby rewards me with a small, grateful smile, and then I watch his retreating back as he slips out of the gym to get ready for practice.

And I remain rooted in place with what feels like the biggest decision of my life.

Colby avoids making eye contact with me throughout practice and the video session afterward. Then, instead of eating in the players’ lounge with everyone else, he took his premade meal back with him as he left, citing a headache was forming and he didn’t want it to make it worse.

I can’t deny that the avoidance stings.

Is he separating himself because I didn’t give him an answer?

He’s always been a little flighty when it came to the more social side of things, but I understood. Being around this many people day in, day out, can be a lot. Also, he has it worse than all of us, and knowing what I do now about him struggling to fit in with people, it all makes sense.

But now I’m wondering if his confession earlier—and his special request—has made him feel like shit. More than it did before.

The house is empty when I walk through the front door. Kicking off my shoes, I head into the kitchen to grab a drink and a snack from the freshly restocked fridge, then make my way up the stairs to my room. The moment the door shuts behind me, I fire off a text to my childhood best friend, Piper, asking if she’s free for a call. I need to speak to someone who is much more intelligent than me to figure out what I should do while keeping Colby’s identity a secret.