Page 78 of Branded

I stare at the phone, wanting to call back, but I put the phone away and walk to the bedroom. Through the bathroom door, I can hear water running. My imagination runs wild to a naked Lennox standing under the spray, trying to wash away this entire day, and I long to have her in my arms again, to sink myself deep in her and show her that I can be who she wants me to be.

Instead of barging in and interrupting her shower just to quench my need, I change into sleep pants, leave my shirt on, and lie down on my side of the bed. The shower eventually stops and Lennox emerges in an oversized T-shirt, her hair wet, her face scrubbed clean.

She looks at me for a long moment, checking to see if I’d actually keep my word.

“You’re wearing a shirt,” she observes.

“Less temptation to touch you if there’s a barrier.”

Something like amusement flickers across her face. “That’s considerate.”

We lay there in the dark, two people who were violently intimate hours ago now separated by eighteen inches of mattress and a chasm of broken trust. And I realize this is going to be harder than anything I’ve ever done.

Not fucking her. Not owning her. Not controlling her, but actually being a partner. An equal. Someone she can trust not to weaponize power when things get hard.

I close my eyes and try to sleep, hyperaware of her presence beside me, of the careful distance she is maintaining, of the trust I’ve destroyed and will have to rebuild molecule by molecule.

26

LENNOX

We’ve been on the ranch for five weeks, and we’ve fallen into a rhythm with one another. Sebastian is trying to be less controlling, and it’s actually kind of cute when he freezes mid-sentence because he realizes what he’s saying.

Sun shines through my eyelids, and I know I’ve forgotten to close the curtains again. I stretch and roll over, finding the opposite side of the bed empty. I heard him come in late last night; he’d spent a few days in San Francisco dealing with a hotel issue, and knowing he was back, all I wanted was to roll over and cuddle into him. I’ve missed him so much. My body aches from needing him, from waiting for him to break his promise and reach for me. He hasn’t. I should be happy, but I long for his touch.

I hear movement in the kitchen, the smell of coffee drifting through the house. I pull on jeans and a T-shirt and pad barefoot to the kitchen. Sebastian stands at the counter, two mugs of coffee waiting, wearing jeans and a black shirt with the sleeves rolled up. His tattooed forearms are on full display.

God, this man would make a nun break her vows. I force myself to look away, anything to break the spell he has over me, whether he knows it or not.

“Morning,” he says, more husky than normal. Or am I just so fucking horny that every word he says sounds sexy?

“Morning.” I take one of the coffee mugs. “Thank you.”

“Did you sleep okay?”

“Better than I have been knowing you were coming home. You?”

“No, I wanted you in my arms.” He leans against the counter, maintaining distance.

He takes a sip of coffee. “Can we finally talk? Because I’m about ready to say fuck it to everything we’ve been doing to build us and take you upstairs.”

“I’d like that,” I say.

“The talk, or taking you upstairs?” The corner of his mouth twitches, and I can’t help but smile.

“Maybe both?” I put a bit of space between us and move to the window, looking out at the ranch operation already in motion. Cowboys working, cattle moving, the constant rhythm of a working ranch. “But first, I need to tell you something. And you’re not going to like it.”

His body tenses immediately. “What?”

“I’ve been thinking that I should go to Montana. To see my family.” My nose stings, and I blink faster to will away the tears that want to spring from my eyes.

Heavy silence hangs in the kitchen.

I turn to face him, watching the war play out across his features. The instinct to refuse, to control, to remind me of the contract, battles against the promise he made yesterday to try to be different.

“For how long?” His voice is tight.

“Three or four days. Maybe a week.”