Page 67 of Fallen Court

“What for?” He scratched his eyebrow like it might jog his memory. “I’m the one who sold you out to that psychopath.”

“I kept you in the dark. I didn’t leave you any other options.” And I had made a bargain to save his life. How could I blame him for doing the same thing?

But Channing shook his head. “There are always other options.”

It was possibly the wisest thing he had ever said. Clearly, he had been spending a lot of time with Shaw.

We both fell silent. It wasn’t the comfortable silence of friends or family, the kind that came without expectation. It was the lingering, awkward silence of two people who cared deeply about one another but had forgotten how to talk to each other.

Channing was the one to finally speak. “Nothing’s ever going to be the same between us again, is it?”

Fresh tears hit my cheeks, and I wiped them away quickly. “No, probably not.”

He dropped his head, and his hair—always too long—fell to cover his face.

“But that’s not a bad thing,” I continued. “People change. They grow.”

In the end, the root of all love was choosing whether to grow together or whether to grow apart.

He lifted his head. “Are you with him?”

I didn’t have to ask who he meant.

I nodded. “Yes.”

Maybe I didn’t know what that looked like. Maybe I had a lot to sort through. But Lach was a part of my life now.

“By choice?” he asked quietly.

Choice? The question triggered the memory of today’s conversation with Lach. I could reject him. He’d told me so himself. I could refuse to accept that he was my mate, and he would respect it.

Lach had given me the keys to my prison, which meant the mating bond wasn’t really a prison at all.

But there was still so much we didn’t know about each other.

Channing cleared his throat after a few moments of silence. “Now you’re worrying me.”

My smile was tight but genuine. “I’m just trying to figure out how to tell my brother that I’m involved with the Gage family.”

“Dammit, Cate. We swore to each other,” he said lightly, the words conjuring a similar conversation we’d had in a room just like this one not so long ago.

“At least you’re not cuffed to the bed this time.”

Channing picked at the tape covering his IV. “I’m pretty sure your boyfriend would prefer that I was.”

“I’ll talk to him,” I promised, and I would. About Channing. About life. About the future. About everything. “In the meantime, can you do me a favor?”

“Anything.” He winced as he tried to sit up. “As long as I don’t have to give up my pain meds yet.”

I guess vampire blood only got you so far.

“Stay out of trouble.” I leaned over and ruffled his hair.

“I always try.”

Far from reassuring. But he would live, I reminded myself as I said goodbye, heading into the hall to find Ciara.

Channing would walk. He would get another chance, and yeah, he would probably fuck up again. The real question was: What place should he have in my life? My complicated, dangerous life. I’d nearly lost him twice to this world. The trouble was that I didn’t know how to let him go. He was no longer all that I had, and maybe it was selfish of me, but despite that, I still wanted him around.