Page 32 of Bombshell

I force myself forward. “I left a few books. I hope you don’t mind if I…”

It occurs to me that Cy might not have kept the books. Hell, he might have a new roommate. Why hadn’t I thought this through?

“Yeah, actually,” he says. He casts an apologetic look at Poppy. “A few more minutes.”

But she’s not paying attention to him, she’s too preoccupied murdering me with her eyes. I’m not surprised that she hates me. She’s Adair’s friend not mine, and she never seemed to particularly like me before I left.

“Hello, Poppy,” I say casually. My uniform feels stifling in the southern heat, but I’m glad I wore it, because her eyes flicker over it making mental notes.

Tell her where I am. Tell her I look good. Tell her I’ve moved on.

“I’m going to grab a bite,” she tells Cyrus, pecking him on the cheek. “I’ll see you in Finance.” She tosses one last searing glare my way.

“Grab me a sandwich,” he calls after her, but she’s already gone. Cyrus sighs when she doesn’t respond. “Sorry, man. It’s a girl thing. Come on in.”

I follow him inside the room and realize for the second time that I deluded myself coming here. Pick up some books? Tie up loose ends? That might be easier if every step I took in this city didn’t remind me of her.

“It’s weird seeing you in that uniform,” Cyrus says. “It looks good on you.”

Spoken like a true trust fund kid. Next he’ll thank me for my service. I tug at my jacket, making sure there are no creases in it. “Thanks.”

“I don’t remember seeing any books. I think Poppy might have given them to Adair…” He moves a few piles of paper on the desk. It looks like he’s actually spending time here. Maybe he always wanted to, but not with me around. It’s not my room anymore. None of this is mine, so I just stand there awkwardly.

“And she probably burned them,” I say dryly.

“You aren’t exactly her favorite person.”

I smirk, ignoring the weight his words drop on my chest. “The feeling’s mutual.”

After a few more minutes, he finds a stack, shoved under the bed. “Here they are.”

It’s only half of the ones I thought I’d find. Adair must still have some, unless she really did burn them. She returned my copy of The Great Gatsby—the only I really cared about getting back. For some reason, I almost wish she hadn’t—like it would have meant shit for her to keep it. Her copy of Persuasion is gone along with the antique copy of The Sun Also Rises she gave me for Christmas. I shouldn’t be surprised. I shouldn’t be hurt. Those weren’t my books anyway. These ones are mine, notes and all. It’s not much reading material to take with me. Francie flat refuses to send me shit. She’s still upset about what she calls my ‘idiotic decision.’

“So, are you at bootcamp?” he asks.

“Finished. I have a few days before I head to Camp Lejeune for special ops assessment.”

“Special ops?” Cyrus whistles, running a hand over his hair. I guess I finally impressed him. “Wow, just wow. And then?”

“More training, get stationed somewhere.” I know the basics. I signed the paperwork. The details hardly matter though.

“Like Iraq or something?”

I suspect it’s all the same to him. “Something like that. I don’t really know.”

“How long are you going to be in town?” he asks.

“Only until tomorrow,” I say. “I figured I would tie a few things up. Say goodbye.”

“To me?” Cyrus grins widely. “Thanks, man.”

“I don’t think anyone else will miss me.” I have a fleeting fantasy of going to Windfall to bid Angus MacLaine farewell by pissing on the polished marble floor in the foyer. It might finally get Adair’s attention. Nothing else has: not my calls or texts or emails.

“You really didn’t come back to see Adair?” Cyrus presses.

“Would it matter if I did?” I shrug, ignoring how my heartbeat ratchets up at hearing her name. Sometimes, I think I dreamt her—that I dreamt all of this. But standing here now I know that’s not true. All of it happened. All of it.

“You have a day,” Cyrus says. “Look, I don’t know exactly what went down between you two. She won’t talk about it, even with Poppy. But I bet she wouldn’t want you to wind up at war or something without saying goodbye.”