Page 49 of Fake it ’Til Fall

Puck’s head tilts.

Even the squirrel seems interested, the nosy little bastard.

“Yes, this is Forrest Wolfcraft,” I respond. “How can I help you?”

Puck sits.

I take it as a win. We are not chasing the squirrel. He understands we’re also not walking until this call ends, which means one of us is about to suffer. Given his expression, he assumes it will be him. Naïve.

“I hope I’m not catching you at a bad time,” Principal Whitcomb says.

When people say that, I want to answer, ‘Don’t you think I wouldn’t have picked up?’

I don’t.

My mother raised me better than that, and my PR company sanded the worst of me down with scripts, media training, and a polite smile that makes a man feel like he’s being murdered by stationery.

“No,” I say. “Not at all.”

“Wonderful. I wanted to follow up about the coaching position, and also personally invite you to the sports dinner this November.”

Sports dinner?

I should have known the initial interview wouldn’t follow just another interview. My agent mentioned the first conversation was preliminary, which I interpreted as don’t be an ass for twenty minutes, and maybe they’ll let you near teenagers with skates.

Apparently, Winterberry Cove has a more rigorous selection process.

Good for them.

Terrible for me.

This feels less like applying for a coaching job and more like purgatory with name tags.

No, not purgatory.

That sounds too brief.

This is whatever comes before the nine circles of hell when someone makes you fill out community engagement forms in triplicate.

Fuck.

Puck leans against my leg.

I’m not sure if he wants me to hurry up or if he knows the muscles in my body have gone tight enough to snap. He’s a ridiculous animal, but he notices things. That makes two of us.

“I’m listening,” I say.

“We’re still very interested in moving forward. Your experience is impressive, of course. The athletic director is enthusiastic. Several boosters are too.”

I stare at the squirrel through the glass.

She stares back.

I don’t know what to say to that except what else do you want from me, which would be honest, rude, and probably not a sentence that leads to employment.

“That’s good to hear,” I say.

Look at me.