Page 64 of The Write Stuff

I planned on changing that.

“So, we have about 15 T-shirts to choose from,” she said when we reached the back corner of the store. “Do you know if she likes original Trek better than The Next Generation?”

“I know she likes Klingons. I think she likes both original and Next Generation, though.”

“Klingons, huh?” The clerk made a growling noise that caught me off guard. “I bet she’s gorgeous and speaks Klingon, right?”

“How did you know?”

“Because you’re really hot and that’s the unstoppable combination.” She pointed. “That one is probably a good bet, even if it’s simple.”

The shirt was just words. It said, “I speak fluent Klingon.” My heart soared. “I want that one for sure. What else have you got?”

She helped me pick out four shirts. Then I saw one for myself. “I need you to be honest,” I instructed, angling my head toward the shirt with Kirk’s face on it. It said, “Is that a phaser in my pocket? Or am I just happy to see you?”

“Are you asking about that for yourself?” she asked.

I nodded. “I think it’s funny. I’m worried that it’s too sexually aggressive, though.”

“Isn’t she your girlfriend?”

“Yes, but it’s new.”

“Oh.” She brightened considerably. “Well, if you haven’t known her that long —”

“I’ve known her the bulk of my life,” I corrected. “We grew up together. The romance part is just the new part.”

“Oh.” She seemed to consider it. “Does she have a good sense of humor?”

“The best.”

“Then I think you’re safe wearing it. She’ll get the joke and appreciate that you’re pointing it at her.”

That was what I was going for. “I’ll take that, too.” I looked around. “Is there anything else Star Trek themed here?”

“Are you going to love bomb her or something?”

I was familiar with the term. I’d never once considered that I would participate in a campaign, however. “I probably won’t give her everything tonight,” I acknowledged. “That would make me a weirdo. I just wouldn’t mind having a few gifts to drop on her going forward.”

She sighed again, the sound long and drawn out. “I am so jealous it’s gross. I never want to meet this girl, by the way. I’ll be so jealous I’ll want to pull her hair out.”

“It’s impossible not to like Wylie,” I countered.

“Yup. Totally jealous.” She motioned for me to follow her toward the front of the store. “How does she feel about slippers?”

“I think she would be a big fan.”

“We have tribbles … and spaceships … oh, and emblems.”

I knew the second I saw the tribble slippers which way I would go. “I’m going to have the best time buying stuff for her,” I realized aloud.

“Yeah, and I bet she’s the type who will appreciate each and every gift.”

“She’s exactly that type.” I grabbed the slippers. “What else have you got?”

MY SHOPPING TRIP TOOK THE BETTER part of the afternoon. That meant, when I got back to The Landings, that I had time to shower and get ready. Then I called for an Uber. I could have taken my vehicle, but that would really cut down on the cocktails. Ubers were easier.

I wore my new phaser shirt and packed the Klingon shirt in a bag to give to her. Everything else had been stored away, neatly, in my closet. I would indeed be love bombing her with gifts going forward. I was actually looking forward to it.