Page 82 of Two for Roughing

“Ketchup won’t stay gone forever. We’ll have to go back to being roommates and nothing more after Christmas break, right?”

Damir’s throat constricted. “Right.”

“I mean, I guess we crossed the boundary a day early for my full-on mental collapse at being outed by a shitty reporter, but it was almost Christmas break then. Thanks for taking care of me again, by the way.”

“Anytime,” Damir said weakly.

“Oh, dude, you don’t want to give me so much leeway.” Kilian smiled up at him, his fingers toying through Damir’s chest hair. “I’ll be asking you for it all the time.”

Why on earth wouldn’t Damir want that? “You can—”

“No, seriously, Damir, don’t…don’t tell me I can.”

Striving for an even tone, Damir asked, “Why not?”

“Because—” Kilian pushed himself upright. “—I…ugh, let me show you.”

Not understanding why he’d leave their cocoon, Damir reached for him, but Kilian was on his feet and padding toward the bedroom before he could stop him. For a moment, Damir wondered if this meant the end, if he’d pushed too hard, and Kilian would get dressed, then decree their Christmas break and their sexual relationship over.

Before he could get too worried about it, Kilian reappeared, still mostly naked, with his phone in hand. Damir shifted to his side, propping himself up on his elbow to make space for Kilian.

“So,” Kilian said. “I know things are super complicated for you with Russia and your religion and everything, and I’m out now. I mean, I guess I already was, but now, I’m out-out, and…ugh, just read it.”

He thrust his phone at Damir, open to the Firecrackers’ website.

Damir read.

After a few minutes, Kilian shifted in his seat. “I think they put it up an hour or two ago. That’s what Brianna said they’d do anyway. I haven’t looked at the responses. But, um…” His leg bounced up and down.

Damir placed a hand on his knee to stop the movement and continued to read.

“I know this means you can’t be seen with me anymore,” Kilian continued, “and if you need me to move out I can—”

Damir squeezed Kilian’s thigh. “Shh.”

“But—”

Damir looked up at him. “Kilian, this is a long post, and I read slowly in English. Give me a minute.”

“Oh.” Kilian subsided but continued to radiate anxious energy; Damir could feel it coming off him in waves. He took the time to finish the post all the same.

When he was done, he set the phone aside and sat up to wrap his arms around Kilian from behind. “I don’t want you to move out.”

“But…Russia?”

Damir bit the inside of his cheek. Now wasn’t the time to talk about his vague thoughts of “someday” and the realizations Kilian had sparked in him about his future. They were both mostly naked, and Kilian had done something monumentally life-changing. Damir didn’t need to put fuel on the fire of his confusion. He definitely didn’t need to mention his own budding feelings. Kilian wasn’t in any place to return them.

“Let that be my worry,” Damir said.

“If you say so. We’re still teammates, though, so.”

Right. Kilian was concerned about the team. Privately, Damir thought it wasn’t too irresponsible. He took his role on the team seriously and trusted himself to make sound judgments about it. In this case, he didn’t think it would be a problem. For one, two players who couldn’t stand each other were a much bigger issue than two who liked each other enough to date. Coworkers met, dated, fell in love, and got married every day. Neither of them was immature enough to make it the team’s problem if things fell apart either. But if it was important to Kilian, Damir would abide by the rule. For now. Damir squeezed a little tighter and ran his fingertips over Kilian’s ribs until he started giggling.

“Talking on the phone has worked out fine so far.”

“You want to keep it up?” Kilian leaned into him a bit, and Damir wrapped an arm around his shoulder.

“Sure. We can have that at least, don’t you think?”