Page 22 of The Blessing

chapter 12

closer

Ronnie comes over an hour later with bags of takeout from a local Chinese place. She insisted on getting the food, stating it’d be hard for me to go anywhere with a teething baby to take care of. I insisted on paying her back for it because I didn’t want to seem like some asshole who’d mooch off her. I’ve never been the type to take advantage of someone’s good nature. Even when I was high as fuck all the time—I always managed to pay people back and do some semblance of the right thing.

Ronnie giggles as soon as she sees my exhausted face. “You look like you’re starving. Everything go okay at work today?”

I nod, then eagerly jog to the kitchen to grab some drinks, plates, and utensils before joining her on the couch in front of my television—which has become our normal spot. We’ve eaten a few times together at the dinner table, but most of the time I like the casual ambiance of sitting with food in front of the television after a long day at work. I want to take her somewhere nice… Hell, I’d like to take her any place at all, even if that meant the local pizza spot or a chain restaurant nearby. Since we’ve become friends, we haven’t been out to eat once. I’m always too tired and we’re both such homebodies, so we always liked staying in. But I can’t use that as an excuse anymore. If I want her to see me in a different light, I’ve got to start doing all that romantic shit. Which is too bad because I wouldn’t know “romantic” if it punched me in the face.

I want to give her sunshine and fucking rainbows, and hearts and flowers, but I don’t even know where to begin. I’ve heard of guys visiting their girl at work and bringing her coffee or lunch; I would start there, except Ronnie works from home. I could always stop by a coffee shop on the way home and pick her up something. She’d probably be impressed.

“What has you so lost in thought?” I hear Ronnie tease me, causing me to peer up from my box of kung pao chicken to look at her.

“It’s nothing,” I say, hoping I don’t look as embarrassed as I feel. I look at Grey, who’s rocking away in his baby gym and smile, wondering if I could incorporate him into my plan to “woo” Ronnie. Woo? Really, Trevor? When have you ever used that word?

“Grey stood up today,” I state, smoothly changing the subject. “He pulled himself up off the floor and stood up for a few seconds before falling right back down on his ass.”

Ronnie practically chokes on her fried rice as she laughs. “That’s amazing, Trev! Maybe he’ll do it for me later? That’s so impressive!”

I sit up straighter, feeling proud of her assessment of my little boy. “I think he’s been afraid of trying to do it since he fell, but I’m sure he’ll forget all that and try again soon enough.” She smiles at this and continues to eat her food. “Hey, I wanted to ask you about something coming up next month…” I begin, enjoying the way she instantly perks up in her seat. “It’s my mother’s birthday the thirteenth and she’s having this big party and I was wondering if you’d like to go with me?” I pause, running a hand through my hair in a nervous gesture. “I just don’t want to go alone, you know? All my parents’ friends will be hounding me all night if I’m by myself.” I know it doesn’t sound like a romantic gesture in the least, but I also want her there because I feel calmer when she’s at my side. So, I tell her that. “I really want you there with me, Ronnie. It’ll be hell without you.”

She smiles, finally seeming convinced. “I’ll go with you, Trev. Don’t sweat it.” She pauses to look at Grey. “Is Grey coming with us?”

“Yeah, I think my mother will want the chance to show him off to her friends.”

“Well, I’m sure we’re in for a fun night,” Ronnie says with a coy grin. Hell, if she only knew. We’re in for a night, all right. But I’m not sure how fun it’ll be.

Ronnie’s phone buzzes in her pocket and she quickly whips it out to read a text. She rolls her eyes as she looks at the screen and puts her phone face down on the couch.

“What is it?”

“It’s nothing,” she says with an annoyed shake of her head. “It’s just my sister, Eden. She thinks she’s a matchmaker. I love her, but sometimes she drives me crazy. She thinks since she’s older, she should try to help me out—but sometimes I wish she’d just take a hint and back off.”

“What do you mean ‘matchmaker’?” I ask, wanting to kick myself for the nervousness that is creeping into my voice. Her sister’s trying to set her up with someone? Hell, I hope she doesn’t succeed in finding someone for Ronnie because I’m someone for Ronnie. I’m man enough for her. Whether her sister is aware of that or not.

“Eden’s trying to set me up on a blind date with one of her friends.” Oh, fuck no. That’s not going to happen. “I tried telling her I don’t feel comfortable with a blind date. I wouldn’t be so opposed if it was an acquaintance, but if things go sour between me and one of her friends it’s going to be awkward.”

It’s going to be especially awkward when I bust in and kick Eden’s friend’s ass for trying to get with my girl. Ronnie my not know it yet because I only realized it myself a little bit ago—but she’s going to be mine one day. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but one day she’ll be my girl. I don’t want to sit on the sidelines and watch her try to find happiness with some other guy. She doesn’t need other men. She just needs me.

“What are you going to tell your sister?”

She shrugs and takes a bite of her eggroll. “I’m just going to tell her to forget about it for now. I’m not really looking to date right now. I just got my career rolling and I want to ride that wave for a while. Eden’s always been so codependent, she doesn’t understand what it’s like to actually enjoy being alone. She went from being a daddy’s girl, to having multiple boyfriends, to finding the right guy and getting hitched at twenty-two. She’s freaking out because I’m twenty-five years old and don’t even have a boyfriend.” She finally exhales after stringing all of her sentences together and smiles at me. “Sorry, I’m rambling. I just always feel like I have to defend all of my life choices to her.”

“It’s okay,” I laugh, scooping up a fork full of fried rice off of her place and scarfing down before I continue to say, “I like your rambling.”

“Well, that’s why you’re easily my best friend.”

Best friend. If I play my cards right, she won’t be seeing me as her “best friend” for much longer.

The first step in my master plan to “woo” my beautiful neighbor is bringing her a drink from her favorite coffee shop. I’d been smiling like a fool all day just thinking about the surprised look on her gorgeous face when I hand her the drink. I know it’s not a grand gesture or any shit like that, but I’ve always heard that it’s the “little things” that count. It’s just a way to show her that I appreciate and care about her. I pick up a Vanilla Hazelnut Latte on the way home—it’s the only coffee drink I really know since I’ve seen her with a cardboard cup off countless fucking times—and I can’t help but feel a little embarrassed on the way to our apartment complex. How long will it take her to notice how I feel about her, and how will I react when she finally does know?

Part of me knows I’ll be fucking relieved, but I know another part of me is fucking nervous. I don’t want to screw things up with her. Things with her just feel so right and the thought of losing her over something stupid is terrifying for me. Hell, I want some nicotine just thinking about it. Every time I stress out I want to inhale a pack of cigarettes and forget about all my problems. The smooth rich taste of Marlboros and the nice buzz I get after a six pack of beer is like getting a hug from your oldest and dearest friend. Too bad those days are long gone. That doesn’t mean I don’t think about that shit constantly because I do. I think about it all the fucking time. Luckily, I have some amazing people to distract me from acting out on my desires. I need Grey and Ronnie more than I care to admit.

I run by my parents to pick up Grey, explaining to my dad that I’ve got to leave straight-away. He gives me a knowing grin but doesn’t ask if it’s “because of a girl,” although, I can tell he wants to. I’m jittery the entire way back and the kid’s music I play for Grey on the way doesn’t help my nerves one bit. “You think she’ll think me bringing her, her favorite coffee drink is cute, little man?” I ask, earning only a giggle in return. I take a calming breath as we finally arrive home and decide to play it all off as though I’m doing her a friendly favor. If she wants to read more into it… she’s more than welcome to. “Come on Grey, let’s go surprise her.” He’s babbling in my arms as I lope up the steps and Ronnie must hear us coming because she opens the door before I get the chance to knock.

She looks flustered, causing my smile to instantly falter. “I brought you that coffee drink you like,” I say with a small smile, holding the cardboard cup out to her to take.

A nervous laugh escapes her lips and she runs a hand through her curly hair before taking the cup. “Thanks, Trev.” She gives me a long once over, before looking nervous once again. Is something wrong? Is there some fucker I need to beat up for her?