Page 121 of Forever Offsides

“Now you want to get to know me?” he gripes incredulously. “You were never around⁠—”

“I was always around,” I snap, cutting him off before I temper my tone. “Always. You have no idea how hard I tried to know you and be all the things I could be to you. Your mother made that nearly impossible. Regardless of that, I went to school events whenever I could, I made all of your games, even through college, and I paid more fines than I can count for having to fly separately from the team to away games or getting to practices late. I stayed with a shitty team and turned down others to stay in Florida with you. I became a college coach to stay there even when the NFL was what I wanted. You had everything you needed and a hell of a lot more. Concert tickets for you and your friends, and a new car when you got your license. I did everything I could for you, but it was never enough because I never married your mother, and she was bitter about it. Nothing was ever enough for her either. Did you know she didn’t get married until the day you turned eighteen because what I paid her in child support was too good for her to give up? I took excellent care of your mother. But I didn’t love her anymore, and I wasn’t going to marry her. You can hate me and act as if I owe you something I never gave you, or you could try believing that I love you and always have.”

“Do you know what it was like growing up with a great Rhett Jones as your father? Do you know what it’s like to never be able to live up to your greatness and always be cast in your shadow? Why do you think I didn’t want people to know you were my father? I had to make a name for myself aside from being your son.”

I huff. His words crack across me like a whip, the sting just as fierce.

“That didn’t come from me. I never made you feel that you were less than the amazing person that you are.”

He continues as if I didn’t speak. “So perfect, Dad. Always following every rule. There’s no one who can live up to that. Certainly not me.”

I shake my head and plant my hands on my desk, feeling as though I’m going in circles. “Russel, I’m far from perfect, and at some point, you’re going to have to stop blaming everyone else for the choices you make or the things you do. I love you. I’ve always loved you, and I’ve done everything I could to make you feel that. You’re an adult now. You’ve made a name for yourself, and you’re here now playing for me, which was your decision. I want a real relationship with my son, but I’m not going to give you a free pass for your shitty behaviors simply because you are.”

I stand here, breathing hard, waiting for him to hopefully see all that we could have together. It twists me up and reminds me that what I’m doing with Quinn is not only wrong but will push him even farther from me. And I still, even after all these weeks with her, have no clue what to do about all of that.

I’m in love with her. She’s undoubtedly the love of my life.

What does someone do in a situation like this?

“I don’t know what to tell you.”

I nearly laugh at that. That’s all he has to say? “How about that you’ll try?”

He hitches up a shoulder. “I’ve been trying.”

He hasn’t. He barely speaks or tolerates me. I have no idea why he wanted to come here and play, other than maybe the situation in Dallas was worse than he let on, and he truly needed to get out and figured this would be the easiest place to go where he could win and get paid.

Feeling nothing short of defeated and truly, a bit brokenhearted, I simply nod. I can’t force him to give a shit about me or want to be part of my life. I’m here. He knows it. He just doesn’t want it.

I shuffle whatever bullshit is sitting on my desk just to have something to do so I don’t run over there, grab him, and shake him for being so closed off and resistant. He wants me to only be his coach. Then that’s what I am.

“Okay. Remember what I said about the phone during prohibited times. That’s two strikes now. Don’t make it three. See you tomorrow.”

The door shuts behind him. It doesn’t even slam. I barely stirred any emotion in him at all.

I sink into my chair and put my head in my hands, not knowing what else to do. After a beat, I check my watch and realize the time. I need to get going if I want to make it to Quinn on time.

Being a parent doesn’t get easier, no matter how old or grown your children are. We’re always reaching for them while they’re pulling away. I’ll just have to keep fighting.

I climb into my car and speed all the way up toward the New Hampshire border.

When I get out of my car, I tilt my head curiously at the sign.

Inner Snow Experience Labs.

Okay. I have no clue what I’m in for, but I’m ready for whatever she has.

I open the door and fuck me running, it’s not what I expected at all. There’s a small lobby with some chairs and sofas that look out through floor-to-ceiling windows onto an enormous indoor ski and snowboard mountain, I guess you’d call it. There are all kinds of runs and stages with different equipment, most of which I have no clue what they are.

I step closer to the window and squint. On the far side of the massive indoor arena is a huge fenced-in trampoline, and Quinn is jumping on it with something attached to her feet as she flips and twirls through the air.

“Hi, may I help you?”

I twist my head to the young girl behind the counter. “Hi. I’m here to see Quinn Reyes.”

“Oh yeah. She’s on the trampoline. You can go back.”

She points to a door, and I enter the park. There’s a long staircase down to the ground, but from there it’s almost entirely uphill until I reach the trampoline area. There are snow machines off to the side, and how cool is this?