Page 607 of Lessons in Cruelty
He grabs my waist, pulling me against him, but I plant my hands on his chest and push.
“Don’t.”
He frowns, gaze sullen as he finally makes eye contact. “Don’t what?”
“Don’t try to fuck me so you don’t have to talk to me.”
His jaw tightens. “That’s rich, coming from you,” he mutters.
My voice sounds too shrill compared to his, even while my heart gives a guilty jump. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing. Forget it.”
“No, say it. What do you mean?”
He shakes his head, stepping back. “I need to get out of here.”
“Are you serious right now?”
“Kruger invited me for a drink.” He’s already moving toward the door, phone out to order an Uber. “I’m gonna go.”
The air leaves my lungs like I’ve been punched. “You’re seriously going to leave right now?”
“I need to think, Haven.”
“About what?”
He doesn’t answer. Just shoves a hand in his pocket and taps on his phone, not looking at me.
“Kai. Talk to me. Please.” My voice cracks, and I fucking hate how desperate I sound.
How utterly pathetic.
He pauses at the door, hand on the knob. For a second, I think he’s going to turn around. Going to explain. Going to let me inside the fortress in his mind where he hides when life is too ugly and messy for him to handle.
“You can come with me if you want,” he says, still not looking at me.
It’s not an invitation. It’s an obligation. A half-assed offer he’s making so he can tell himself he tried.
“Yeah, because it’s so fucking obvious you want me there,” I say sourly.
His shoulders tense.
“Just go, Kai. Get drunk with your friends so you can think.”
The door slams shut behind him.
Silence rushes in to fill the space where he was, pressing against my eardrums until they ache. I stand there like an idiot, staring at the door, waiting for it to open again. Waiting for him to come back and say he’s sorry, that he didn’t mean it, that he won’t abandon me somewhere that used to be so fucking perfect five minutes ago.
He doesn’t.
Why would he?
He has Kruger. Friends. Options.
He has places to go and people waiting when he gets there.
I’ve had no one and nothing for fucking years—
