Page 34 of Falling

“You’re a real fisherman already,” he said. “Bragging about the size of your catch.”

“Also like Joel,” I said wryly. He’d never missed an opportunity to brag about the size of his most recent catch.

“You miss him?” Booker asked.

I shrugged. “Obviously,” I said. ”I miss Evie, too, and all our other friends. I even kind of miss Robin, sometimes. But I’m here now. And I’m making friends,” I added, looking up at him. “I’d miss you if I left. Or you did, I guess.”

“No danger of that,” Booker said. “Really? Already?”

I stared down into my hot chocolate. “You’re the first friend I’ve ever had that I made myself,” I said. “Which actually sounds so much more pathetic when I say it out loud.”

“I don’t think it’s pathetic,” Booker said gently. “I’m honored.”

Someone else might have just been saying that, but I knew Booker meant it. He was so sincere, always. He made me feel like he actually wanted to spend time with me.

Which, in turn, made me want to spend time with him. I thought, if he’d asked me to go on a ten-mile hike, I probably would’ve agreed. Even at the risk of spraining my ankle again.

“Speaking of which, Seth will kill me if I don’t summon the courage to invite you to my fortieth birthday party,” Booker continued. “So, uh. Would you, maybe…?”

“I’d love to come,” I answered much too quickly, failing to stop myself smiling down into my hot chocolate. Now I felt honored. Booker was surrounded by people who loved him and he’d still found room in his heart for me. “Why would you need courage for that?”

Booker wriggled in place. “Rejection sensitivity, I guess. I, uh. I have ADHD. That’s not a secret, I don’t know why I’m telling you like it is.” He laughed.

“I bet sometimes people are weird about it. That makes it hard to tell them,” I said. “It’s fine though, so does Evie. So like… I’m used to it. I love her most of anyone in the entire world. Is that why you quit law?”

Booker nodded at the fire, sipping his own hot chocolate. “Got it in one.”

“Yeah. Evie was studying law, actually. For about a month.” I smiled wryly, remembering the day she’d told me she’d quit. Specifically, the language she’d chosen to do it. “So you survived longer than she did.”

“Think it shaved a decade off my life, though,” Booker said. “Wish I’d quit earlier. You ever do anything else?”

I shook my head. “Dad wanted me to do something… more professional, I guess. Boring black suit and tie stuff. But I always wanted this. My soul has librarian scribbled on it in crayon. I’ve loved libraries for as long as I can remember.”

“Can’t imagine you in a boring black suit and tie,” Booker said.

I smiled at that. “It’d have to be a really fun tie. I was going to say maybe if Evie gets married, but if she does she’ll have it on the edge of a cliff and make me rock climb up there.”

Booker chuckled.

“You laugh, you have to come with me,” I threatened, and then bit my lip.

I hadn’t meant to jokingly invite Booker to my sister’s hypothetical wedding. All the same, I wouldn’t have hated it if he came with me. Not just because there was no one else in my life who would, but because it would’ve been nice. And I wanted Evie to meet him. To meet this person I’d found for myself, who I really liked spending time with.

I’d never felt like that before.

I wanted...

Shit. I wanted...

I pushed the thought aside in terror and wriggled deeper into the couch.

“If your sister makes you rock climb your way to her wedding ceremony,” Booker said. “I will come with you.”

“Yeah?” I asked, toying with a loose thread on the couch cushion.

“Yeah,” Booker said, in a tone that meant it was a promise. As serious as I wanted it to be. He gave me the gentlest of nudges and sipped his hot chocolate again. “Couldn’t miss you rock climbing for the world.”

I laughed, sipping my own drink and making a happy sound. Booker’s hot chocolate was good.