Page 41 of Garbage

Evan wanted to believe that meant something. Yeah, but I’m still the only person he knows well. And he’s dependent on me.

Valid. But he knows me pretty well, too, and he doesn’t spout off about how I smile when he makes my favorite breakfast or how my koala pajamas match my eyes.

Holy shit. Had Quincy said that?

Ben was typing again. It can both be true that he doesn’t know many people and that you two have really clicked together.

That was a very sappy thing for Ben to say. Adding to the fact that Ben had never approved of anyone Evan dated before.

So you think I should do this?

Hell yes.

That was… mostly reassuring. Not that Ben did relationships. But he usually had a pretty good bullshit meter for pointing out the flaws in Evan’s boyfriends as soon as they met.

Evan should probably listen a lot more to Ben.

He just really, really didn’t want to be Quincy’s experiment.

Quincy was just… a thousand times better than anyone he’d ever dated. In every single way. He was still changing, as he learned and grew, but the heart of him was still honest and curious and joyful.

And if he was actually turned on by Evan’s porn…

Evan shivered.

But no, he wasn’t going to think about that right now. Thanks, Ben. He sent the short text back.

No problem. Go get your man!

And tomorrow I want details on all those sexy appendages.

Evan groaned. The only reason that wasn’t even more embarrassing, was that Ben also happened to be a sub with a robot fetish.

Evan didn’t bother to answer. But he was feeling a teensy bit better.

He decided that he was maybe a little hungry, then surprised himself by eating everything he’d ordered. He saved a plate of samples for Quincy to smell.

And now he just had to wait. He curled up on the couch with the soft blanket—Quincy’s blanket—and finally started a movie.

Well, a cooking show. Not because Quincy loved watching them, just because it was a good distraction. He’d just watch as many as he needed to until Quincy woke up.

He was determined to avoid thinking about any possible dreamy future with Quincy.

Which was strange, because usually he’d meet a guy and be ready to tie the knot the next week, only to have the relationship fall apart a few months in. Somewhere, deep inside, he must have known that it was just smoke and illusions. Or perhaps his own wishful thinking.

Because with Quincy… God, when he thought about really having something meaningful together, it was like he couldn’t breathe. The possibility of wanting it was too dangerous, because it felt like that this could really be it. Quincy could be the one.

The thought was dizzying in its possibilities.

Or Evan could be completely deluding himself.

Quincy was curious about everything. Of course he would want to explore sex. And Evan was the obvious one to experiment with.

When Quincy moved out of his protective little bubble and really started to meet people, to have his own career and his own friends… Why would he want to stay with plain, boring Evan?

Maybe Quincy liked him now, but he was going to outgrow their relationship before either of them realized.

So… they were going to need to have a big talk tomorrow. Maybe they could explore some kissing or something. Maybe they could even… Evan squinched his eyes shut, thinking of Quincy’s sexy body, the way his weight would feel, pressing him down…