Page 50 of Ruthless Blade

I looked away, tears gathering in my eyes. I didn’t want to talk about the wreck. I never wanted to talk about it. Every night I relived it, a different scenario each time, but the outcome always remained the same. They died; I didn’t.

Why was he asking me this? Why couldn’t he leave it alone? Part of me though, the rational part, knew that even though I was hurting, he was too. He’d never gotten closure, and I guess it was time I gave him something.

I licked my lips and tried my best to get through the pain. “That night, as you know, the hockey team had suffered a loss. I was upset because I had tried to get back on the ice but failed, and didn’t realize I had forgotten my headphones. Those things helped me breathe; listening to my music helped my anxiety when things were rough...”

My hands curled into fists, my breathing escalated. You can do this, it’s okay. You can tell him. He may be mad, but one day he’ll understand...right?

“I asked Dad to turn around, but we were already on the freeway back home. He refused. I asked again, my body was already starting the process of freaking out, and that’s when Jake piped in. He told me I was being stupid for asking him to turn around and that led to an argument, which then led to a panic attack...”

My shoulders shook. “That’s when Jake tried to coax me through it, letting Dad know what was happening, and even he tried to help but nothing was working. He was about to pull over when a truck hit us and the rest...”

My body vibrated, and I couldn’t finish. Tears rolled down my face, my heart beating so fast. Goosebumps trailed up my arms, and I lost it. I couldn’t contain the carefully constructed demeanor I’d prided myself in. I couldn’t hide from him anymore.

Before I could look up and see his reaction, his arms wrapped around me like a warm blanket on a winter’s night. My spine straightened, and he whispered, “Let go. I’ve got you. Let go...”

After that, I didn’t care that my mask wasn’t on anymore. I let him hold me while I cried, the grief from losing my family too much.

Chapter Twenty-Six

LEXI

I didn’t know how long he had held me for. It could’ve been hours or it could’ve been minutes. Eventually, the sobs ceased, and my body stopped shaking.

For a moment, he didn’t let go. He continued to hold me, and part of me wondered if he felt it too? Did he feel the tension?

“I’m sorry,” I said, mumbling into his shirt, before pulling back. I wiped the tears from my face and noticed the dampness of his shirt.

Oops.

When I looked in his eyes, though, they never wavered from mine. There wasn’t a smile on his face, and he didn’t move away from me.

“Kayden?” I asked; he was too quiet. Something was wrong.

He kept his gaze on mine, “Hmm?”

“Are you okay? You’re not blinking.”

It was like he was wrestling with an inner demon because he couldn’t take his eyes off mine and if I didn’t know any better, he was about to do something.

Before I could ask him again, he tilted my chin up, him standing above me as I remained in the chair.

“Lex,” he whispered, and if I were standing, my knees would’ve literally wobbled because the way he said my name about undid me.

I cleared my throat, licking my lips and his gaze lowered. “Yeah.”

His other hand wrapped around my waist, pulling me up and off the stool, where I was flushed up against his body. My cheeks heated, and suddenly, I wanted all deals to be off. I wanted him, and I’d hoped he wanted me.

His gaze darkened, and before he could think better of it, he leaned down, pressing his lips against mine.

My eyes closed, and as the kiss started off gently, it quickly turned heated. The hand on my back went under my shirt; his firm, calloused hand touching my skin set me on fire.

His tongue pushed through my lips and met mine, and a moan escaped my lungs. All thoughts, gone, I didn’t want him to stop. Ever.

He reached down, placing his hands under my butt, and lifting me up so my legs could wrap around him. Food completely forgotten, he carried me into the master bedroom, laying me on the bed.

Were we doing this? Was this actually going to happen?

My stupid inner voice wouldn’t shut up, and as I lay on the bed, partially sitting up, resting on my elbows, I watched him for a minute. I bit my lip, wondering what he was going to do next, and my eyes widened when he took off his shirt and threw it to the side.