Page 54 of Lessons in Lemonade

Butterscotch and pecan sticky bun

Today could not have gone any better.

Granted, I started on cloud nine thanks to one very tall, dark, and handsome guy, but as the guests arrived and the first course hit the table, everything went as smoothly as possible. From being back in the kitchen and working side by side with Shelby like the good old days to having Jack and Zach both dressed in suits with no ties charming the guests and serving the different sparkling wines with each course, it was as if everyone was in a relaxed, blissed-out trance.

Then again, maybe it’s the magnolias. Jack doesn’t know this, but like jasmine, the smell the flowers produce binds to receptors in the nose that send signals to the brain, telling it this is the scent of romance. When diffused into the air, magnolia creates a calm and serene atmosphere. It helps relieve stress-related tension, reduce anxiety and depression, and ultimately relax the mind and body—just what we want when people sit down to dine with us.

And dine with us they did. Over and over we heard murmurs coming from pleased palates, photos were taken of the dishes, and nearly every plate of every course was wiped clean. It was a chef’s dream come true.

“Something is going on between the two of you,” Shelby says speculatively as she slides up next to me. We’ve just thanked the last guest for coming and returned to the kitchen to finish cleaning up. She pulls an elastic from her pocket and whips her blond hair up into the perfect ponytail as I grab an apron to wrap around my waist.

“Oh yeah it is,” Taylor chimes in almost immediately as she exits the walk-in cooler and overhears us. Staff members are moving around us, cleaning to close things down, and politely ignoring what they’ve just heard. They’re good like that. Taylor and I have had many conversations in the kitchen, and not once has my sous chef or any other employee so much as raised an eyebrow our way.

Zach and Jack left a little bit ago to go grab a beer together before Zach and Shelby head back to Georgia, and right this second, with the two of them staring at me, I wish I had gone with them.

“What do you mean?” I ask Shelby as my attention turns back to her. Her arms are folded across her chest and my insides take a dive because I know that look. I’m about to get a lecture, even though I don’t want one.

“Sometimes you are as slow as molasses. We all saw the way the two of you were looking at each other today. I mean seriously, the sexual tension is so high and so hot I about expected the place to burn down.”

“You’re crazy,” I tell her, feeling slightly defensive. Taylor moves to stand next to her and nods in agreement. She hasn’t mentioned this morning and I don’t think she will, but the two of them are ganging up on me, and I don’t like it.

I mean . . . maybe there were a few heated looks between us, I can’t deny that, but after that kiss this morning, how could there not be? His lips are definitely something I’m not going to be forgetting for a long time, nor do I want to, but we’ll move past it soon enough. We have to.

Or do we? After all, the expression friends with benefits was coined for a reason.

“You do realize the man has it bad for you, and I’m pretty sure he has for a while, right?” Taylor says, and my benefits thought comes to a screeching halt. She turns to Shelby. “Did you know he comes here every day to eat lunch and spend time with her? As if they don’t see each other enough the rest of the day when she’s not here. Then when she’s ready to go, he drives her home.”

“No, I did not know that.” Shelby turns accusatory eyes my way. “Keep this up and you’re going to hurt him. Do you want that?” she asks, making me feel like I’m somehow doing something wrong.

Anger rises a little as I stare at my friends. “How would I be hurting him? He knows I don’t want to date—anyone—and it’s not like he’s staying here forever. This is temporary. He knows it, and I know it too,” I say defensively.

“He may know you don’t want to date anyone, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re allowing him to fall for you, and you won’t commit. You don’t commit. You’ve never committed to anyone.”

I pause and think about what she’s just said. She makes it sound—makes me sound like my promises to myself are a bad thing. She knows better than anyone why I am the way I am, and my anger now mixes with hurt.

“I’m not letting him fall for me. I’m not responsible for anything he does. Besides, I like my life the way it is, and you know this.” I do. Things are simple, easy, and predictable. There’s no drama, and not only do I like the peace that brings, I need it.

“Yes, but we’re not just talking about your life—we’re talking about his, too. He’s a nice guy, Meg, and it’s not fair to him.” She shakes her head and frowns.

Am I not being fair to him? I don’t think that’s the case. I hear what they are saying, and I know how it looks from the outside, but we aren’t like that. We never have been. Other than that kiss, we’ve always been just friends. I want us to just be friends.

Come to think of it, from everything he’s ever told me, he’s never really done the relationship thing either, and he’s also not a monk. I’m sure he’s had plenty of friends with whom he had benefits with over the years, and if it wasn’t a problem for him then, why would it be now? If anything, this conversation with them is giving me a little perspective about how things might be with him if I wanted them to be. He understands me, and I understand him: Charleston, Tampa, football, OBA, distance, different lives, friends, best friends. It’s the perfect situation for both of us.

Taking a step away from them and toward the office, I need this conversation to end, and I need them to know I’m ending it. “You are both overthinking this. We’re just friends. He knows we’re just friends. There’s nothing to worry about.”

“Are you sure about that?” Shelby asks as she pins me with one last disapproving look.

Butterscotch and Pecan Sticky Bun

ABOUT AN HOUR after Taylor and Shelby ambush me about Jack, he and Zach stroll back into OBA as we are finishing up on the final details before going home for the day. I can’t help but look at him differently, and I like what I see. I also like how I feel when I look at him.

Maybe they’re right. I’m not a dense person—I know he’s attracted to me, know he has been since the party last summer—and I am attracted to him too. How could I not be? He’s quite possibly the nicest guy I’ve ever known, and he’s genuinely beautiful on the inside and out. That said, he knows where I stand on things, so if he gets hurt, it isn’t going to be by me; it would be by himself. I’ve never led him to believe I want anything other than friendship from us.

And I stand behind that.

As the five of us head out onto the street to lock the door, Taylor flips her hand up in farewell before sauntering down the sidewalk toward her apartment, Zach and Shelby hug us one last time with promises to see us both soon, and then it’s Jack and me left staring at each other.

He gives me one of his signature smiles, and my stomach tightens; he can’t see the confusion mixed with today’s adrenaline swirling in my head. He holds out his hand, silently asking for mine. Slowly, I slip it into the warmth of his, and the rightness and easiness between us soothes the war in my heart.