Page 2 of Risking it All

In spite of the shitty hand that I’d been dealt, I really did love the dress. It cost half the value of the luxury car I drove to work every day. The only thing that made me feel good about what I had to do to restore my family’s good standing was spending as much of my father’s money as I wanted to in order to make my dream wedding a reality. It didn’t matter that I didn’t know or love the man I was being forced to dedicate the rest of my living days to. It was my new destiny.

I was told to spare no expense when it came to my wedding. Out of anger, I’d been selecting the most expensive version of everything, even though I knew I could never break my father. If I was being forced into a marriage, I at least wanted to look good as hell for my big day.

I’d chosen to have my dress custom made by my boss at The Diamond Needle, because Emerson Cruz was the best of the best. She had proven herself a hundred times over. I looked like an absolute princess in my dress.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I reminisced on the dream of happily ever after that had been long abandoned. I swept my butt-length blowout up into the hair tie that was around my wrist as I gave myself one last assessment. Aside from my hair and complexion, I was nothing like the beautiful twenty-one-year-old girl with my whole life ahead of me.

Seven years ago, before my hopes and dreams were squashed, I woke up bright and early every morning, worked out and ate a healthy meal, and read a book in preparation for a long life with the handsome man I’d been trained to love and serve forever.

From the day I turned ten years old, I’d known my fate. As a member of The Force, my dad had the obligation to submit heirs to be wed into another family of the organization. When I turned twelve, I was matched with another family’s fifteen-year-old son.

The Fuller family was well known and well respected. I was told that it was an honor that our families were matched. I’d met and befriended their son knowing that, eventually, we would get married. He felt like I was a little girl and kept me out of a lot of his personal business, but he was cool because he was so easy to talk to.

My parents never talked about anything. I at least wanted to be able to talk to my husband about my problems and concerns. I felt like if I had to marry someone, who better than a person I considered a friend? I never really questioned why my family got to pick out my husband because as far as I knew, that was just the way things went.

Our wedding was supposed to take place right after Reed graduated from college. Imagine my surprise when he called off the wedding and went on to complete his abduction missions and leave the family business altogether.

The man literally killed people so he wouldn’t have to marry me. One of those men happened to be one of my cousins who’d been stealing from The Force. My dad was glad that the blood didn’t wind up on his hands directly. On the other hand, he was pissed that the wedding he’d been planning on using to leverage his power in The Force for years was never going to happen.

Reed’s dismissal came with heavy disdain from my family. My father, in particular, felt like I had been tainted by the rejection. He blamed me for Reed’s falling in love with another woman, saying I must have done something to turn him away.

For years, I went over every encounter and conversation we’d had, looking for my mistakes. Had I been too eager to please him and make things work? Had I not shown enough interest in the things he liked? Was I too skinny? Too fat? At the end of all the stress and mental turmoil, the only thing I came up with was an antidepressant prescription and an extra fifty pounds tacked onto my frame.

Not a day went by when I wasn’t reminded of the wedding that didn’t happen. Especially since my sister’s commitments had also been called into question along with my family’s standing in The Force.

Once word of the cancellation spread throughout the organization, my family was put on probation. I had to go through the humiliation of being checked out by a doctor to make sure that I hadn’t been tainted before the ceremony. The procedure would have taken place anyway, to confirm my virginity, but having to do it without the promise of a wedding and a whirlwind romance at the end hit a lot differently.

I was violated for no reason, and my sisters were still not allowed to wed, not that they cared. Back then, I was the only one looking forward to getting married. Ironically, after everything was said and done, I no longer wanted to get married. It didn’t matter what I wanted. In thirty days, I was set to marry Roderick St. Thomas.

Roderick was the second oldest son of Rodriquez St. Thomas. They were one of the four families that ran The Force. My family, the Morgans, were one of the others along with the Fullers and the Jenkins families.

As one of the family patriarchs of The Force, my dad’s number one goal in life was to have two sons to train to follow in his footsteps in the business. That lofty ambition left him with four daughters before my mom finally had enough sense to say enough. Having no male heir to offer meant that he had to give up two of his daughters.

Although we weren’t all obligated to carry that burden, my mom trained all of us to be quietly observant in the company, obedient, and always useful to the men in our lives. My dad drilled the importance of maintaining our virtue until we were married into our heads. Seven years after my wedding was canceled, I was still a virgin, waiting for my husband to appear.

“Fuck this,” I mumbled to myself, tearing my eyes away from my reflection.

Unlike me, my sister Zara had figured out a loophole and went to college to buy herself some time before she was required to get married. I had accepted my fate, but Zara wasn’t with it. She seemed to be the only sane one in the bunch. She always preached about how the whole rhetoric of an arranged marriage was outdated and complete bullshit. It had been weeks since any of us had heard from her, even me.

I was the only who she’d confided in when she decided to run. I was the only one she trusted. Zora and Zuri were such daddy’s girls that they would have ratted her out before she had the chance to get away.

Last semester, she finished her master’s program and started her position as a physician’s assistant at a local clinic. A week later, she got a huge bouquet of carnations with a congratulations card attached. Her future wedding date set ninety days away was written on it. She went to my dad to protest and ask for more time, only to be reminded of her obligation to the family. Now she was in the wind, and I was essentially her stand in.

“They’re going to kill my baby when they find her, Zahad.” My mom sobbed into my dad’s chest.

The stern look on his face didn’t match the expression of the woman he claimed to love and cherish with his entire heart. Knowing my dad, he was ready to lead the witch hunt to track Zara down. I said a silent prayer that they never found her.

My eyes shot over to Zora as she sat with her arms tight across her chest. I wondered if our sister had confided in her, too, but I knew better than to ask. Miss Priss was always tight lipped. That didn’t stop my dad from releasing his hold on my mom and stalking over to stand over her. Her hands dropped to the arms of the chair she was in as my dad leered over her. She was white as a sheet when he shoved a long finger in her face.

“Where the fuck is that sneaky little bitch?”

“She didn’t tell me anything.”

“Lies!” he roared.

“Zahad, she said she doesn’t know anything!” my mom spat.

“Fina, the girl is lying! You know she’s a fucking liar just like the rest of them!”