Page 58 of Unbreakable Thread

“You know, Cano, I thought you were different. I didn’t think fame would change you.” She unlocks her door, gives me one last sweep of my body, and slams the car door shut. I’m so bewildered by her words that my mouth is still open.

Sol’s car rumbles to life. I rap my knuckles against the window, half expecting her to drive away. Instead, the glass slides down. Those shaped eyebrows of hers lift slightly, though the rest of her face remains locked in that familiar glower. Behind it all, I catch the telltale shimmer of unshed tears.

“I don’t understand what you are talking about.” My phone rings, and I cancel the call. “What has you upset? I’ve given you the space you asked for, Sunshine.” It rings again. Mierda. I cancel the call. Annette keeps calling for a fucking photo shoot we have today. Not together, but at the same location. I don’t even know how she’s calling. I had blocked her number years ago. “Are you upset because I’m here?”

“You’re right. I asked for this. I just—” She swallows, then a broken laugh slips from her lips. “Just don’t look for me. I guess he was right. It was what you needed.”

Before I can answer her, the window rolls up, and she’s backing out.

Who is he? What is she talking about? Running my fingers through my hair, I groan in frustration. My phone dings with an incoming text message from Drake. When I open it, the color drains from my face. She must have seen it.

Goddammit.

Chapter 18

Rainey

This is my third session with my therapist. Last session, we continued talking about my adoptive parents. And today, it’s Max. “When did you see Max again?” She leans back into her seat, crossing her legs.

“It was in the summer after my first year of college.”

She nods and writes something down. “How did you feel when you first saw him?”

The memory brings a smile to my face. “I was speechless. I truly thought I’d never see him again. At first, I thought I would get the closure I needed when he never returned to school the following day. But then things changed. I…I fell in love.” I sigh and lie down on her large velvet couch, tucking the dress between my legs and crossing them at the ankle. We weave through that summer and when he left me in tears. Now that I understand why, the gnawing in my chest no longer aches.

“How did you two find one another?”

Again, I walk her through our relationship. I told her everything was perfect until it wasn’t. Then I overheard the word “adoption,” and I ran.

“Can you tell me what it felt like to hear those words?”

I think about her question just as I have for the past months. “If my biological parents had given me up, perhaps I would have thought differently. But they passed away, and I feel they took advantage of the situation of me having severe amnesia. I feel betrayed and manipulated.” They manipulated my entire life without my knowledge.

“Do you think you can explain to me how you felt knowing you had a life before Rainey as Sol?”

A tear slides down my cheek. “I wish…I was never Rainey… Sol had a beautiful life until her parents died. I wish she never lost her memory.” She hands me a tissue. I try to explain. “Before the accident that triggered my memory back, I was confused, but curious at the same time. I was Rainey, a grown-ass woman. I couldn’t be a small girl named Sol. But when I woke in the hospital with my entire life flooding back—the memories I’m still having, I now long for the small child I was. I want to know everything about her.”

“You speak of her as if you are two individual people.”

I didn’t answer right away. Perhaps she’s right. I always refer to Sol as she and her, never me. Mrs. Sanders grabs her iPad and takes more notes.

“Sorry, I just started using this, and it’s taking me a minute to get used to.” Her fingers swipe, then she peers at me. “Go ahead, hun.”

“It’s been hard for me to accept the fact that…” I sigh. “…I’m adopted, and I had a different name.” My emotions have been all over the place. I don’t even know what to cry about anymore. Pregnancy escalates it all. I wipe the tears and blow my nose.

“Take your time.”

“It feels as if I’ll never get the answers I need. My adoptive father has been MIA, my mother passed, and that wound is still fresh because I loved her, and I somehow feel betrayed by her. We were close. She left me a letter with an attorney.” A broken laugh slips from my lips. “I picked it up, but I haven’t read it. I lost trust in them. What if it’s all a lie, or maybe it will make things harder for me?”

Mrs. Sanders purses her lips. “When you feel ready, you might want to read that note. But if you find you don’t need it to feel whole again, that’s fine too. You could throw it away or tuck it somewhere out of sight. Or perhaps ask someone close to you to read it first—they might help you decide whether what’s written there would help your healing process or reopen old wounds.” The timer goes off, indicating our session has ended. “Your homework for next session is to write down ten things you love about Sol and ten things you love about Rainey.”

Once I get to my car, I take a long, exaggerated breath, laying my hand on the roof of my car and my head on the window. I try to control my breathing and the ache sitting in every part of my body. I rub my belly. “It’s okay, sweetie. Everything will be fine.” I don’t want the stress in my life to affect my baby. After seeing the news article yesterday and seeing Max today, it’s a sword to my chest. Why the fuck is he looking for me when his damn face and little miss desperate bitch’s face are plastered all over the place? Not just Sunday’s paper, but his social media page. Caption reading: A couple who wins together stays together. The same photo from the charity ball is on his page. The comments are like a telenovela.

Oh my god, they are so cute together.

She’s much better than his last girl.

Ugh, I wish he were mine.