Page 174 of Between Two Kings

“Tem,” murmured Caspen. “What is on your mind?”

There was only one thing on her mind. “I miss you,” she whispered.

“I am right here.”

But that was barely true. Physically, he was right in front of her. But in reality, he may as well have been a thousand miles away. It was torture not to touch him—torture to see what she couldn’t have. It was the exact same feeling she had every Sunday night when she watched Leo with Evelyn.

“I need you, Caspen.”

His expression softened. He shifted closer, his body angled toward hers. “You have me, Tem. You will always have me.”

She stared into his golden eyes, trying to find the truth in them. Did she really have him? Would they survive the tournament—would her heart call to his? Tem had no idea what to expect from herself anymore. All she knew was that right here, right now, she missed him.

“Lie down,” Caspen said quietly. “We should rest.”

Tem lay down. But instead of resting, they talked—about everything and nothing, anything but their current circumstances. Tem told him about her childhood, how the schoolchildren had teased her. Caspen told her about his family and how difficult it was to grow up with Bastian as a father. It was the first time they’d talked like this. Their connection had always been physical. But it was beautiful to connect with him this way as well, on an emotional level. Tem wondered if they ever would have had such a conversation if their marriage hadn’t been contested and they hadn’t been able to touch. She found it remarkable that the very thing pulling them apart now drew them together.

Tem drank Caspen in: his beautiful body, his dark hair, his sharp jaw. She memorized every inch of him as if it were the last time she was ever going to see him. Caspen did the same, his gaze lingering on every part of her. When they were finally done talking, Tem touched herself, and he watched. Then he touched himself too. When he came, he formed his essence into a claw and set it on her stomach. This, at least, he could still give her. Tem savored its weight. Then she inserted it slowly, her legs wide open so he could see it disappear into her inch by smooth inch. Caspen watched every moment of it, his eyes completely black.

Eventually, they headed to the lake. By the time they arrived, the celebration had already begun. The cavern was even bigger than Tem remembered it, the lake going on for what seemed like miles before disappearing into the horizon. The sloping shore was already packed with basilisks, all of them naked. Tem stared out over the chaos. She shook her head in wonder.

I’ll never get used to this.

Yes, you will. It is a part of you.

They walked to the edge of the lake together.

“Do you remember your first time here?” Caspen asked.

“Of course,” Tem said.

She remembered it well, how it felt to stand in the lake where Kora had bathed, to feel the same water she had felt. It was a wondrous thing, and Tem did not take it lightly. The same energy she’d felt the last time she was here pricked again within her now: something otherworldly. Divine.

Caspen turned to her. “I was so proud of you that day,” he murmured. “You were brave.”

“I didn’t even transition.”

“But you tried. That is what made you brave.”

It was typical of Caspen to praise her for accomplishing the bare minimum. But Tem found that she appreciated it, and for a moment, she allowed herself to be proud too. There was something to be said for simply trying. Many people were too afraid to even do that.

They looked out over the water together. The claw pulsed.

“How is it that we were able to transition here?” Tem asked. “Shouldn’t the reflection have killed me?”

“I am surprised it took you so long to ask.” Caspen smiled. “The lake is sacred. It does not affect us the way other reflections do. It is the only reflective surface that cannot kill us when we wear our true forms.”

Before Tem could ask any more questions, Adelaide approached. “Temperance,” she said smoothly. “How are you this evening?”

“Fine, I guess,” she said.

Adelaide nodded. Then she turned to Caspen. “The council wishes to speak with you.”

Caspen nodded. “Very well.”

“It is nothing to fear, Temperance,” Adelaide said at the look on her face. “This is standard. The council always meets with the spouse the night before the tournament.”

Still, Tem worried. Every moment she was separated from Caspen felt significant, as if they might never be reunited. With one last lingering glance at her, he disappeared.