Page 82 of When Ashes Fall
“He’s been through a lot.”
“Are you making excuses for him?”
“I’m stating facts. I remember who he used to be.”
“That man is gone; in his place is an asshole.”
I couldn’t argue with that. Nor could I argue that we’d both be far safer away from Knox; I just had to figure out how to pull that off.
As we neared the gates, sprites hovered above the wall before fluttering away. A second later, the gate started swinging toward us, and we rode into the bailey.
Once we were inside, I looked up to discover a dozen sprites flying over the wall with buckets in their hands. Whatever those buckets contained, they didn’t let it fall as they eyed the beast.
Instead, the mischievous creatures returned the containers to the parapets and flew away. Some of them became invisible as they went.
They’d made the wise choice not to unleash their newest prank on the beast, but I missed the sound of their laughter, especially after everything that happened last night and this morning. Everything felt devoid of merriment right now.
As I brought Magnazius to a halt near the stables, Knox transformed again. He did it so rapidly that I was still sliding from the horse when he took the reins.
“Get inside the castle,” he commanded. “I’ll take care of Magnazius.”
I didn’t like following his orders, but it was foolish to argue over this—it might be a good way to get someone or something killed. He’d resumed his male form, but his slitted pupils revealed the beast lurking below the surface.
I didn’t say a word as I turned and stalked toward the castle.
CHAPTER FIFTY-ONE
Knox
I calmed further as I bathed Magnazius with a sponge and a bucket of soapy water. Just being around the stallion had a soothing effect as he occasionally nuzzled me before resuming grazing.
A warm trickle of blood still ran down my inner thigh, but I ignored it. The wound throbbed, but I couldn’t say I didn’t deserve it.
I’d been disgusted with myself after the way I treated her last night, but at least then she’d been eager and receptive. Today, I’d been determined to get her back to the castle and safely away from me, but that all went up in smoke the second she defied me… again.
So instead of getting her to safety, I’d humiliated her like they’d done to me so many times in the harem. I couldn’t keep my shit together around her, and that was as infuriating as the woman herself.
Fuck.
I dropped the sponge into the bucket and ran a hand over the stubble covering my head. When it came to her, I was more of a monster than the beast could ever be.
I’d tear the limbs from anyone who dared to mistreat her, and I’d rip the jugular from anyone who humiliated her as I had. Yet I couldn’t stop myself from exerting my dominance over her, but then, she was the only one who so often and openly challenged my authority.
It didn’t help that she was my mate, unclaimed, and no longer mine to have. Not claiming her was tearing me apart.
Lifting my head, I stared at the cluster of roses I was sure were the stable boys. How could I claim my mate and find any happiness with her while my kingdom remained a desolate, broken place?
You’re assuming she’d be willing to be claimed by you after everything you’ve put her through.
And that was a very good point. I’d seen the fury and sadness in her eyes when she emerged on the porch this morning. I felt it again when she latched her teeth onto my thigh.
She’d always been feisty, but now she was a fiery, beautiful woman with a spirit I was scared I’d crush. And if I was honest with myself, a part of me wanted to crush it, bend her to my will, and make her as broken as me.
I was a mess, and it was all because of her… yet I wouldn’t change anything. I wouldn’t allow her to be anywhere else. I might annihilate us both before this curse ended, but I didn’t care. It would be worth it to keep her.
The beast howled within me. I hadn’t allowed it to hunt and kill after I refused to let it have access to Briar, but as much as I’d hungered to slaughter something, I couldn’t leave her unprotected in the cabin.
I could hunt now, though.
