Page 33 of When Ashes Fall

When my words registered, he recoiled a little. Unable to resist, I rested my hand on his cheek. He turned away from my touch, shrugging it off.

“I’m broken too, Knox, but I want to heal with you.”

When he abruptly stepped away from me, cold air rushed in to replace his warmth. Wrapping my arms around my belly, I tried to ease the bereft feeling his loss created within me.

What did I just do? I should give in to him.

You’re not a toy to play with and toss around whenever the mood strikes him. You’re already your mother’s punching bag; you won’t be his too.

I lifted my chin and tried to emit a confidence I didn’t feel. For a second, I swore I saw yearning flash through his eyes, and not for sex but for something more. It vanished so fast I couldn’t be certain.

“There’s nothing left of me to heal,” he stated. With that, he turned and stalked toward the door. “After breakfast tomorrow, I’ll take you out to gather more mushrooms.”

With those final, parting words, he left the room.

Unable to stand any longer, my knees gave out and, with my back against the counter, I slid to the floor. I rested my head against the wooden cabinets as I fought the tears burning my eyes.

I had to get out of Wildwood and away from Knox before we destroyed each other further.

A ticking drew my attention to the door as Gizzi poked his head into the room. “When did you leave?” I asked.

“When things started to get a little too hot in here.” He scampered toward me and settled against my leg. “If I’d heard you scream for help, I would have attacked him.”

Despite my misery, I chuckled as I pet Gizzi’s head. Having him with me helped ease some of my melancholy, but my heart still felt like someone had kicked it.

“Are you okay?” Gizzi asked.

“I haven’t been okay in years, but I’ll find my way there again.”

“Yes, you will.”

“He’s going to take me to gather more mushrooms tomorrow.”

“I’m going with you.”

I didn’t say anything while I continued stroking his head. Eventually, I found the strength to stand again and return to work.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Briar

Knox didn’t speak to me the entire time we walked through the castle, outside to the door in the wall, and through the woods. The hostility between us made things awkward and our gaits stiff as we stayed at least five feet away from each other.

I was a little afraid that if we got too close, I might jump on him, lock my legs around his waist, and tell my brain to screw off. I’d spent the night tossing and turning while I swung between regretting my decision to stop him and barring my door so I never had to see him again.

Irritated with my endless flopping, Gizzi muttered his displeasure before retreating to sleep on the chair.

I wished I could abandon myself that easily, but unfortunately, I was trapped in my skin. And my skin felt far too taut for my body.

Around midnight, I got up and took a shower in the hopes it would make me feel better. It didn’t.

I finally fell asleep around dawn, only to wake a few hours later. Now, I was tired and in a really bad mood, considering I was outside the walls again.

Knox’s mood wasn’t any better than mine as he stomped through the woods with little care that the breaking branches might attract a predator… one who could snap trees in half. But then, that predator could be the one stalking along beside me.

My eyes felt gritty as I glared at the offending oaf. His stomping, crashing, and cracking were not helping my headache, and I’d had about enough of it.

I was about to tell him to be quieter, but he stopped walking and waved his arm forward. “Here we are,” he said gruffly.