Page 98 of When Roses Burn

His hot breath against me and the way he nipped my clit caused my legs to wobble. I wanted to slump into his arms and curl up against him, just as I used to. I yearned for the security and love that enveloped me when he held me, but I also sought more.

I’d just come, yet I needed more of this man. I had to have him inside me, filling me, as his arms encased me and his sounds filled my ears.

Dropping my hand from the shelf, I gripped his shoulder. I craved having the hard, thick length of his cock pulsing against my hand as I stroked it before guiding him inside me. I’d lock my legs around his waist and refuse to let go while riding him until we were too exhausted to move.

And then I wanted to do it all over again. It had been years since I’d last experienced him, yet my burning desire for him hadn’t waned. It never would.

When he licked my clit again, I whimpered as little thrills ran along my nerve endings and coiled in my belly. “Seth.”

The second I said it, I knew I’d made a mistake as his broad shoulders stiffened beneath my hands and his tongue stilled. My breath caught in my lungs, burning there as neither of us moved. Then he dropped my leg and pulled away.

I closed my eyes as my foot hit the ground with a thud; dread replaced the ecstasy that had been building within me again. Limbs just loose and relaxed were now so tense I didn’t dare move them for fear they might break.

I felt him rise before me, felt the heat of his body towering over me, and while I longed to keep my eyes shut, I couldn’t be a coward. I took another breath and pried my eyes open.

Knox stood before me, and there was no doubt that’s exactly who this man was as his orange eyes burned into mine and his shoulders blocked the room. The rigid set of his jaw and stony expression caused the scars over his right eye to stand out more.

He exuded an air of power and menace as he lifted the back of his hand to wipe away the wetness surrounding his mouth… my wetness. When he finished, he lowered his hand, and his gaze raked my body.

I was uncomfortably aware of my half-dressed state and the wet spots over my nipples. It took everything I had not to cover my shirt with my arm, but I refused to squirm.

He rested both his hands on the shelf over my head as he leaned closer. My heart skipped a beat, turned over, and then leapt into a rapid rhythm I was sure he heard.

I didn’t think he’d hurt me, but I didn’t know this man, and I was a fool to think I still did. He’d told me over and over again he wasn’t the man I remembered… the one I’d loved and still desperately did. And here he was showing me, yet again, that Seth died in the harem and this ruthless man replaced him.

Yet, despite my determination to stay away and his conviction that he would never claim me as his mate again, we remained inexplicably drawn to each other. Me by my love for a man who had ceased to exist, and him for his desire for a mate he’d renounced.

If this kept up, we’d destroy each other. That sudden conviction hit me like a hammer between the eyes.

“I told you not to call me that,” he snarled.

I opened my mouth to apologize, but the words froze in my throat. Instinctively, I knew it would only incense him more.

Without another word, he turned and stalked out of the room. Behind him, the ivy fell with a rustle before silence descended.

My breath burned all the way out and then back into my lungs as a knot lodged in my throat and tears burned my eyes. What did I do?

But I knew what I’d done. I’d allowed myself to indulge in the fantasy of believing things could be like they were before, that he was still Seth and still capable of love.

I had no doubt he was still capable of fucking me, but of loving me?

I didn’t know if Knox could experience that emotion. He’d shut himself down in the harem, turned himself into someone callous to survive, and while I understood why he’d done so, it destroyed him… and me.

His blood was still hot, but his heart had turned to ice.

Maybe, just maybe, I could look past what he’d become to ease my lust for him… if I didn’t love him so much. But I couldn’t pretend he was Seth when he wasn’t; it would only shatter my heart, and he’d never agree to that game.

I wouldn’t either, even if I longed to do so. I missed Seth as much as I’d miss my arms if someone tore them off.

While I would have gladly given myself to him, it was better that things went south before going any further… or at least that’s what I told myself as I pulled up my pants, buttoned them, and inhaled a shuddery breath. I tried to tame my hair into some semblance of order, but my hands trembled while I worked.

Yes, this was definitely for the best.

Then why does it feel so wrong?

I managed to get my hair back into a ponytail and leaned against the shelf as I studied the empty room. It hadn’t felt wrong while I was in his arms again, but here, outside them once more, everything felt awful.

What are we doing to each other?