Page 46 of When He Plays

“Bad things happen when I make mistakes.” People die.

“What in the world would make you think I ever cared about something bad happening?”

She kept her eyes closed. “I was recruited for the CIA when I was in college.” A soft confession. “They do that, you see. Get eager kids at college fairs. They look for people who are good with languages, who can pass all their psych exams. And they look for those who have no attachments. Because if you don’t have attachments, then no one will notice when you vanish for long periods of time.”

Jamar had formed attachments after joining the CIA. His wife. His precious twins. His family was the reason why he wanted out. He didn’t want to be halfway around the world, pretending to be someone else, while his kids grew up with a stranger for a father.

“No attachments?” A careful question from Logan. “That means no family.”

That was exactly what it meant. “My parents are dead. I was an only child. No cousins. No close relatives.”

“I’m sorry.”

Me, too. Some days, she felt so damn lonely. “Enough about me. We aren’t going to use the entire five minutes on my truths. I have questions for you.”

“Fire away.”

Time to dig deep. “What is the worst thing you’ve ever done in your life?”

She heard his swift inhale.

“Cut straight to the heart, do you, Charlotte?”

“I—”

“You want to know so that the CIA can blackmail me some more? Want to know where I’ve buried bodies? What terrible crimes I’ve committed?”

“This isn’t for the CIA.” It wasn’t. “It’s for you and it’s for me.”

“Why?”

“Why do I want to know?” Was that what he meant? “Because I’m trying to decide if I should trust you. You reveal the worst thing to me and that will show trust. It will prove to me that you won’t hide your dark spots from me.” She found herself holding her breath. I want to trust you, Logan.

“The worst thing I ever did was leave my sister behind.”

She stiffened. “You don’t have a sister.” Was he going to lie when he’d promised only truth?

“Simone is my sister in every way that matters.”

Simone Sailor. She knew the woman, had met her on a major mission not too long ago in London. Simone was beautiful, charming, and marked with more than a bit of a wild streak herself. In many ways, Simone might just be the female version of Logan.

Simone was also currently planning to marry the ever-so-dangerous CIA operative who’d saved her in London, Ryan Quinn. Ryan was completely and totally in love with Simone.

“Simone and I met in foster care,” Logan said. “I watched her back. She watched mine. We were together when we had no one else. Two terrified kids. I promised her that we were going to make it. That we would be a family.” His voice deepened even more. “Then my grandmother was able to get custody of me. She hadn’t even realized I was in foster care. She and my dad—they’d had a bad falling out years ago. When she learned what had happened to him, she came looking for me. She made a home for me, but when I left that foster house, I left Simone. I left my sister behind. She was mine to protect, and I left her.”

There was guilt in his voice. But she suddenly understood so much more about him. “That’s why you are so adamant about protecting the people who belong to you.”

“My parents died when I was a kid. I was utterly helpless back then. Couldn’t do anything but grieve. The day I was taken out of foster care—I wasn’t told by the case worker that I was going to my grandmother. I was just told that I was leaving. I fought to stay with Simone, but they made me leave. She was crying when I left. Begging me to stay with her. Simone was so small back then.”

His phone chimed. The alarm. Their five minutes were up.

The mattress dipped, and she knew that he’d extended his hand to turn off the alarm.

The time for truth was over. He’d go back to being flippant. She’d go back to keeping her spy secrets. For some reason, that felt cold.

Then, in the dark, Logan continued, “I convinced my grandmother to take Simone in, too. But my grandmother could barely afford to feed herself, much less me and Simone. So I had to become inventive. I took whatever jobs I could.”

Like Jake had done. The wannabe ball player.