Page 38 of Worth the Risk

I spotted a purple wildflower just to the side of the path up ahead and released her hand to grab it. Plucking it at the stem, I came back to Zoey and stuck it behind her ear.

We looked at each other and the air seemed to grow thick between us. Longing rushed through my veins and her eyes gleamed with something familiar that I had been worried I’d lost forever.

All I wanted to do in that moment was lean in and kiss her, but a voice from further down the path pulled us out of the moment.

“We’ll reach a good stopping point up ahead in about ten minutes,” the man guiding the hike called out to everyone.

Zoey let out a sigh. “I guess we really should catch up with the others.”

We’d fallen quite a bit behind, so I didn’t disagree, but I wished that I had more time to talk to her alone. It felt like no matter how close I tried to get, she ended up pulling away.

But as we rejoined the others, I couldn’t help noticing that she kept the flower tucked behind her ear.

Chapter Fourteen: Zoey

The night that Ford broke up with me, I promised myself that I’d never settle for less from a man ever again. I was ashamed of the secret nature of our relationship, and I didn’t want to ever feel small like that again.

But it was more than that. It was a vow born of fear.

I knew I deserved better than a hidden relationship, but that promise was really about trying to protect myself from further pain. Because I loved the man, despite the issues we had.

Today, when Ford shared his history with me and told me with absolute certainty that I’d be a good mother, I felt the protections I put in place fall away. The anger and hurt that I clung to didn’t matter in that moment because love rushed back into my heart. When he tucked that flower behind my ear, all I wanted to do was throw my arms around him.

That was a problem because as much as I wanted to believe that we could find happiness together, I needed to remember that this wasn’t our real life. The island was magical in a way, and it was easy to get caught up in the romantic setting and Ford’s heartwarming devotion, but on Sunday, we would be returning to Chicago, where all of the problems between us still existed. The job and Dr. Serrano and Delilah. The little moments that hurt because they made me feel unimportant and the big moment when he shattered me.

As easy as it would be to forget they all existed, I couldn’t. Because as much as it hurt to lose Ford the first time, if I let myself believe all his promises and it fell apart again, it would be even worse.

The fear was still there, and it ruled me.

So, when we sat down for the rehearsal dinner that night—after a practice run of tomorrow’s ceremony on the beach—I purposefully didn’t sit in the empty seat beside Ford. Even when Damien took the chair I wanted beside Kelsie, I refused to go to my ex.

That was how I really needed to think of him. My ex.

Instead, I sat next to Jake. The meal passed by in a blur of laughter and lively conversation, and I didn’t let my eyes stray to the other end of the table where Ford was once. Because I knew without looking that his blue eyes would be filled with regret and the deep affection that I always thought was love.

But it couldn’t be. He wouldn’t have broken up with me if it was.

That was what I told myself, and I honestly wasn’t sure if it made me feel better or worse.

“Mark my words, you’re going to end up with a minivan,” Jake said to Ryan. “First comes marriage, then kids, then you’re trading in that Mustang you love for something soccer moms drive.”

Jess pointed her fork at him. “Hey, no bashing soccer moms. They are superstars.”

Cody laughed and put his arm around his wife. “Besides, a minivan is practical when you have kids.”

I couldn’t help thinking about myself driving a minivan and driving around a little version of myself and Ford. Maybe a little girl with his blonde hair that I would take to gymnastics class or a little boy with my brown eyes with a paper mâché volcano in his lap as we went to a school science fair.

For the first time, I could see a future with my child beyond the fear that had taken root as soon as I found out I was pregnant.

I knew that was because of Ford, and for the first time that evening, I looked in his direction. Of course, he was already watching me. There was an intensity in his expression that made my breath hitch.

“Zoey?” I jolted and turned to Jake, who was frowning at me. “You okay?”

I forced a stiff smile. “Yeah. Of course.”

Just trying to figure out what to do about my secret ex and the father of my child.

“I hope everyone is ready for dessert,” the waitress said, appearing at the table with a massive tray balanced on her hand.