Page 85 of The Last Guardian

“I tried everything,” I whispered, taking a painful swallow. “I’ve read every book on memory loss, tried every herb, but nothing has ever worked.”

I met his gaze again, letting him see everything. The hope, the desperation, the sorrow, the longing to stop living. To disappear into nothingness.

“I need to remember, Zaidkiel.”

It was not a command, but a plea.

Zaidkiel’s eyes softened, boring into mine, as if he was seeing me for the first time through every layer that had hidden me for so long.

“We will,” Zaidkiel promised, gently caressing my cheek with his thumb, chasing away the tears falling down.

And the hollow inside—that endless ache I’d carried for so long—it felt less. Not gone, not healed, just quieter.

MY SOUL SWIRLED in the stars and embers of the layers of emptiness, as I fell in the Void, searching for my Anchor.

The darkness lured me as Zaidkiel’s voice echoed in my mind, the smoke and flames beckoning me to follow him.

A light burst, lighting up the Void in a white flash, where no beginning, no end existed. A light far wilder than any darkness, and it swallowed me whole.

“ALYA, COME ON!” a familiar voice shouted, echoing around the lake, “Don’t be afraid. Jump in!” Arthur’s brown hair dripped on his shoulders as he called. The warm summer sun shone brightly on the crystal stream, making it even more inviting.

Splashes resonated as Dorian pushed Lyra into the water. Her wild red hair fluttered as her laughter echoed through the forest.

“Leave her alone, Dorian!” Aurora laughed, her golden hair shining with the sunrays.

Dorian grinned before jumping on her, splashing her face in the process, as Aurora’s joyful scream resonated around us.

“Don’t be such a baby, Alya! The water is so refreshing!” Dorian yelled, his freckles dancing on his cheeks from too much sun this summer.

Romy ran at full speed from the forest before jumping headfirst into the water, her brown hair floating in the air before she disappeared into the lake. Arthur swam to reach her, curling his arms around her small body before throwing her in the water, their echoing laughter etching deep within my soul.

My blue linen tunic fluttered around my legs as I watched them from the shore, drinking in their joy.

The warm wind of summer whirled in my brown hair, as wood creaked behind me. My heart stumbled in my chest as I turned and saw Finn—the boy who lived in the Old Town, across from Lyra’s.

“Oh, sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. Lyra invited us over,” Finn said with a boyish smile.

He pivoted to reveal the other young man behind him with soft features, russet irises, copper hair, and a pretty grin.

“I’m Nevan,” the man whispered, his lips curving in the same gentle smile. He gazed at the lake. “Would you like some help to get to the water?” He extended his hand, waiting for me to accept it.

Memories flooded through my mind like violent waves, bursting into the Void as I was pushed away from this precious memory and shifted to another.

The soft skin of his hand brushing mine made me shiver as Nevan led me to our place by the lake. The others were eating around a small fire that Arthur had lit earlier.

The air was cooler. Autumn had taken over Vallen’s hills and forests. Five months had passed. The days had grown longer, then shorter.

I caught sight of the massive boulder that had become our secret hideaway, where we could enjoy each other’s company without anyone around. A big smile curled on my face as I looked at the man I had grown to care for.

Nevan and I had no future together; it was all predetermined. I was already betrothed to someone else. Yet I cherished it all the more, perhaps because it was the only authentic experience I would have in my life.

Nevan’s russet irises met mine as his hand glided down my nape, bringing his face near mine. In a hushed voice, he murmured, “I wanted to give you a present for your birthday, knowing I won’t be able to see you for some time.”

Tomorrow, it would be my seventeenth birthday. My mother had prepared a small family dinner to celebrate.

Meanwhile, Nevan would be joining the army and would be away for who knew how long, staying with one of our earls on the eastern border.

His lips met mine in a matter of seconds. I knew this was coming; we had been circling each other for months, our desire for each other reaching a boiling point that could never be undone.